So, we got a fax at work today

[DZComposer]

I figured you guys would enjoy this fax that came to the place of work today. It's a variant of that old Nigerian Prince scam:

 

ATTN: PRESIDENT/CEO

PLEASE ASSIST MY FAMILY URGENTLY

Good day, I know you might be surprised to receive this letter from me since you don't know me personally. I am Mr. Sunny Lucas, the son of late Mr. Martin Dan Lucas, a Zimbabwean farmer, the owner of Dairy Farms Ltd. in Zimbabwe and Martin Dan Tobacco Producing Company Limited, and Vice Chairman of vocal farming community, who was murdered in cold blood by the Zimbabwean War Veterans and irate black people. {Nice appeal to racism, Mr. Scammer.}

I got your contact address through the South England Chamber of Commerce during my earnest search for a trustworthy and reliable individual who can assist my family receive a reasonable sum of money in his private/company bank account. {Which is it, private or business? It cant be both.} I write to solicit for you special assistance to my family shattered by a tyrannical government ran by a dictator and his (ZANU-PF) ruling party, President ROBERT MUGABE of Zimbabwe: Please click on the links below and find out what happened in our country Zimbabwe form these links. [two partial URLs] {Links? In a Fax? lol} Because of the land and farmland crisis in Zimbabwe, the government secretly sponsored the war veterans and some irate party members to dispose the land being occupied by the blacks and whites farmers. {I'm guessing this is another attempt at racism, but the grammar fail kills it}

This action has led to killing of some members of the opposition party including my father who did not support this ill-fated action. But before the death of my father, he anticipated some dangers and so he smuggled out the sum of US$25 Million (Twenty Five Million Unite State Dollar) to South Africa and deposited it in a Security & Finance Company with the intention of using it for the purchase of farm machinery and chemicals for agricultural Purpose in South Africa and for establishment of a new farmland in Swaziland and Botswana. This money was deposited in a box as family valuables (Treasures) {I believe the word you're looking for is "Safe Deposit Box"} to avoid much demurrage in the Security & Finance Company where the money was deposited for safety. {Demurrage? I guess he meant bank fees as Demurrage is the cost of just holding cash which happens even if you hold it in a SDB}

The war veterans and some supporters of (ZANU-PF) {Those parenthesis again! Must be important!} ruling party trooped into our family farm house and killed my father to death {Because, you know, you can survive a minor case of being killed} and burnt all our family belongings. Since then they have been terrorizing my family but we managed to escape to a neighboring country South Africa for our safety, where we are residing as a political asylum seeker (refugees), and the financial laws of The Republic of South Africa prohibits asylum seekers the right to invest or operate any form of bank account or to operate any kind of business investment in the country. {But wait, you said the money was in a SDB, not an account!}

My family and I have two options for you, firstly, you can choose to have a certain percentage of the money for nominating your bank account in this transaction {Yeah, you want me give you my bank info so you can steal all of my money...} or we can go into partnership with you for the proper profitable investment of the money in your country, whichever option you want feel free to notify us. We will then furnish you with every details of this business transaction you need to know. {More like you take my info so you can raid my bank account...} I have also mapped out 5% If you do not prefer a partnership, we are willing to give you 25% while the remaining 70% will remain for my family {Right, so this money is all your family has left and you're willing to just give a quarter of it to a stranger via random fax dialing? Seems legit.}. Finally, if you are really capable and willing to assist us please contact me immediately with my above contacts {You forgot that part, son} for more information on what to do next. Please treat this matter as urgent as possible, because my family is in dire need for urgent help to leave South Africa to start up a new life in your country soonest. I expect your urgent positive response. Kindly reply via below details or E-mail: [Taiwanese E-Mail Address] {Wait, I thought you were a Zimbabwean in South Africa, but you have a Taiwanese E-mail?}

Best Regards,

MR. SUNNY LUCAS

Fax: [uK Fax number] {Wait, a UK fax number now? So I need to contact a Zimbabwean farmer in South Africa via a Tiawanese E-mail address or a British fax number. Riiiiiiight...}

Don't fall for scams, kids.

Also, Zimbabwe.

[CrypticQuery]

 

I vote that we move all of SF-O's operations to Zimbabwe.

[Hidi]

Zimbabwe calls!

[CrypticQuery]

Zimbabwe calls!

 

No, Zimbabwe faxes.

[Hidi]

To Zimbabwe, ho!

[Scourge]

[Dr. Orange]

 

 

 

Lol such scam.

Zimbabwe is literally raking in money right now. 

[Steve]

 

I vote that we move all of SF-O's operations to Zimbabwe.

 

http://www.webdev.co.zw/

 

Done.

[unoservix]

man now whenever i come to sfo i'm gonna be looking up at the little flag icon in flagfox and looking for zimbabwe's flag

[Arashikage]

http://419eater.com/html/ahmed_sadiq.htm

 

I'm sure you'll all enjoy this

 

It's a guy who sent an email to a guy similar to the fax you received.  The guy who gets emailed decides to have some fun fucking with him.

[Harlow]

Oh High, you thought you could take money from DZ? Them quatrillions not lasting enough?

 

That's why Djibouti's the way to go

[DZComposer]

This much Zimbabwe money buys one roll of toilet paper.

 

He needs a lot more bills in his right hand to be equal to the $10 USD in his left.

[Redeemer]

Zimbabwe can into DZ