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One-Up Contest


Shmibli7

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We've all participated in one of these at least once, even if it was subconsciously. So, why not start one here? State your farfetched fake accomplishments here. Whoever posts must try to one-up the poster above by saying "Oh, yeah, well I (Insert fake accomplishment)"

Let the fight begin! I will start.

Frank Sinatra once came over to my house for voice warm-ups.

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Oh, yeah, well I managed to fly the Millennium Falcon without any training!!

(Yes, that is a Star Wars VII reference).

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Oh yeah, well one time I went to space with an AK-47, and two snapbacks, and came back with a severed alien queen head and 18 bitches.

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Oh yeah? Well, I own both the Fox amiibo and the Fox action figure (thank goodness it ain't SFXZ style!!!).

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Oh yeah, well I am the Dragonborn. 

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Really? I'm a furry penguin!

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Heh... I'm a spy, kid.

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Pssh... I killed a hydra... by decapitating it.

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Ha! I am the reason Boba Fett is still alive.

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I am Doctor Orange.

I am literally keeping you people alive. 

Gg sorry I ended the game

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Pssh, nah, I'm the celestial force that keeps the universe turning.

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All celestial forces must die eventually, I'm afraid.

But I'm the kind of star that lives on after death.

You know, like Elvis.

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Hah. I.... CANNOT.... DIE!

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6 hours ago, Shmibli7 said:

Pssh, nah, I'm the celestial force that keeps the universe turning.

Mofo who da hell do you THINK made you?

I'mma tell you who. 

Me. 

Who's yo daddy?

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I made myself, therefore I am my daddy. Now, be quiet I just conquered Russia.

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I went to Russia once.

Killed 18 bears with 15 bullets fired from a cosmoline-drenched Mosin Nagant.

Skinned it all myself, no armies here, no sir...

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That's nothing!

I became the dictator of the electronic section at Walmart during Black Friday.

We lost twelve men that day.  Good ones too.

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(Grabs mic) I........Love........Star Fox. (Drops mic. Walks away, raising his hand)

Done.

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Oh, yeah? Well I went and saw the new Star Wars, in 3D!

(True story BTW. The new film's genuinly kickass.)

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I'll have you know I saw 

Spoiler

Han Solo get [spoilered]

at the end of the movie, and I only cried for 20 minutes.

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Oh yeah? Well I saw three movies over winter break! 007 SPECTRE, The Force Awakens, and Mockingjay part 2!

(It's also in order from my favorite to least favorite with 007 being the absolute best. There were all really good though and I liked them all.)

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10 hours ago, Clearwater said:

Oh, yeah? Well I went and saw the new Star Wars, in 3D!

(True story BTW. The new film's genuinly kickass.)

Star Fox's Arwings are equipped with gyro-controlled, fully adjustable swivel guns on the nose, and g-diffuser engines, allowing the arwing to aim up to 90 degrees above and below it, and up to 70 degrees side to side of the front. It can also charge it's guns to fire a single powerful lock-on missle capable of wiping out a group of fighters and light tanks, provided if accuracy is accounted for. To top it off, the arwing is capable of firing an oversized, colossal smart bomb, which can wipe out up to two squadrons of fighters within a 200 meter radius, and destroy frigates, cruisers and battleships in one shot. The armor on the ship can withstand collision with solid steel walls, and so can its shields, which can be upgraded to take more damage than a cruiser can ever hope for. Its design and engines allow it to perform two rolls in a second, loop in a second, and Immelmann-turn in a second. This, piloted by the Star Fox team themselves, make the arwing more powerful than anything the Star Wars universe (Besides the force) can throw at it.

This is without even mentioning the Arwing's other abilities, such as  transforming into a bird-like mech, which can allow the arwing to focus more easily on ground units and pinpoint enemy weaknesses, or Aileron Rolling to create a temporary laser deflector.

Not to say this makes Star Fox as a franchise better than Star Wars as a franchise. Basically, the Arwing can 1up any of Star Wars's vehicles, but as a franchise, Star Fox simply can't compete... yet. ;)

 

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