Earnest Endeavor, a story I wrote

[The Green Fox]

Now, before we begin, here's a rundown of some of the characters in the Sploot Kingdom:

Prophet Snudd is a good and wise old man who lives in a hollow tree with his pet cat Mooshy. He drinks tea and practices zen meditation. He is proud of his beard, is a huge fan of the Splootonina Sports team, the Trimbulene Treadmills, and he also enjoys hiking in the woods, studying the Upanishads, sports, and fishing. He likes writing poetry:

"The world is full of mysteries, some shallow, some deep.

As long as we're unraveling them, the teabag of truth will steep" ---- Seer Snudd

Zync: Zync is a gnome. He is the prophesized hero of the Sploot Kingdom.

Azlamb: The benevolant king of the Sploot Kingdom. He is a friendly sheep.

Bloomeelia : Bloomeelia is basically known as the "local sorceress" of the Sploot Kingdom and at first, not much else is known. She is an anthropormorphic cat sorceress. Has connections with friendly but powerful dragons. Is known to overuse the word "cretin" and say bizzare yet strangely humerous things. Also has a huge craving for artichokes. Used to own a mystic pet shop. Much like Zync, she has a mysterious background and lineage however, that is yet to be revealed. Even stranger though, she’s rumored to not even be from the same planet as the other characters. Is first introduced as "Gloomeelia" when Waneul uses evil magic on her. Bloomeelia’s best friends are Prophet Snudd and Jumple, has a friendly rivalry with Mooshy, and occasionally hangs out with Zync, but is confused by him. When Bloomeelia returns to her home planet, she will one day co-star in a spin-off series! Her most famous lines are:

Bloomeelia: "You can make lemonade out of lemons, but you can’t make croutons out of cretins!"

Bloomeelia: "I had a dream last night about a living mustachioed piece of french toast that was trying to win me over with chello music"

Jumple : Jumple is a hilarious messenger who brings the prophecies of Prophet Snudd to all the kingdoms via horseback because everyone respects and adores Prophet Snudd and thinks that his word is THE word. The royalty enlists Jumple to do this. His best friend is Zync. Jumple also likes to deliver prank mail. He also once served in the Great War of Splootonia. He enjoys chinese checkers, martial arts, reading in Latin, rock music, and jazz. Zync suspects that Jumple has a crush on Bloomeelia, after reading a note that fell out of his mailbag. He is a fox cub.

Earnest Endeaver was an absent minded, yet brilliant, prolific and flamboyant well-known

scientist. In the far eastern corner of the Sploot Kingdom, he was identified best as the

inventor of a multitude of amazing air-based modern marvels such as the highly

acclaimed Automated Mobile Kite, an actual inhabitable kite suspended in the air by a string held by an easily proggramable robot, that was set to transmit the kite to one’s desired destination, anywhere in the Sploot Kingdom 24/7. Even more noteworthy, were Earnest’s compact air ships made from tuna cans. However, one day Earnest began to spiral into a deep yet humerous depression, his fans began to find him too ostentatious to their liking, and his inventions began

to degenerate from creative to just downright insane, such as rocket ships devised

of dish soap, and weapons powered by water hoses. If there was one thing

Earnest needed, it was an apprentice. Preferably, two apprentices who would shape the image of his creations, if he could find them. His lucid dreams of budding scientists

knocking on the door, never ceased to end until the 5th of June. One day, (the 5th of June to be exact) suddenly there came a tapping, as if someone gently bapping, bapping on his cavern’s door, he thought for sure it was one of those all important apprentice type folkies, but no. Not that. It was a short little cloaked somewhat scary looking being, his face was not visible, his gloves looked clammy, in his left hand he carried a recently sharpened fake pick axe, and he handed out a letter in his right hand. The sight of this strange shrouded man was terryfying to Earnest. But finally the creature

took off his disguise and revealed himself to be not scary, no on the contrary, the all important anthro fox cub messenger of the Sploot Kingdom, half-cousin of Jyffel Dumbri, chancellor of Falendalia, and an experienced note delivering novice, Jumple JimbleSquirt, who had an attitude towards life like that of a mexican jumping bean fuled by too much enthusiasm. Jumple looked Earnest in the face, with a creepy twinkle in his eyes. Well, to Earnest it’s twinkle was that of immense creepiness. He knew the letter would be baaad news, if Jumple was smiling. One of the king of Sploot’s complaints towards Jumple was that he always smiled when he delivered bad news.

“Yes sirreee, looks like your reign of invention insanity has just come to a halt! Seriously, if ol bearded Prophet Snudd said it it’s gotta be

true!” said Jumple winking at Earnest with a beaming smile. Earnest violently snatched the letter out of the spooky courier’s hand, and found the letter to

be from the esteemed scholar and overly prolific and highly predictable hilarious prophet,

Snelder J. Snudd. Upon anxiously tearing up the envelope in a fit of rage, he discovered

that his invention company would collapse in seven days, if he were to continue

to come up with dorky devices that lacked devious scheming and plotting. Earnest looked

thoughtfully at the messenger who had just given him this earth shattering news,

and he suddenly saw hope springing up like a springboard in the middle of Spring. He started laughing. Jumple took it to mean something else.

“I know. Isn’t it hilarious? The most believed prophet in all the land, with the longest whitest silkiest beard, just declared you would go out of business! Don’t let it get inside you!” exclaimed Jumple, who was now rolling on the floor laughing like

the hyperactive hyena that he was.

“No no no, that’s not it at all,! You’re an energy crisis that needs to be solved!” shouted Earnest.

“Oh. Well. I didn’t think it was funny that your inventions

wouldn’t sell anymore, certainly not that. What cracked me up was

that a letter from a KOOK like Prophet Snudd would even scare you,

big guy! Why measure how wise a prophet is, just because they

have big and long old beard?” said Jumple in a consoling tenor of voice.

“Yes, sometimes even I feel embarresed to live in a world where

a man’s mind myrr is measured by his beard!” declared Earnest.

“Sploot is a crazy place ain’t it? That’s one broken invention

you can’t fix!” said Jumple.

“What I really wanted to ask you was, would you like to help me

test my most recent android controlled kite flying transportation

unit?” asked Earnest with an earnest expression.

“Do you mean that earnestly, Earnest? You really want

me to test that flimsy piece of jun…..ingenious design, yes

that’s what I was going to say. That flimsy yet ingenious

mold of creative blunder, I mean thunder! Yeah!

That be the one!” said Jumple apprehensively laughing. Earnest remained

solumn, and took Jumple very seriously, with his arms folded.

Chapter 2: Jumple Gives the Invention a Test Drive

Minutes anon, the inventor and his newly found apprentice went outside

to test the project. It was a windy day, perfect for kite flying. Perhaps,

too perfect. Fate would have it that technical difficulties were

about to ensue. It WAS Jumple J. Squirt who was testing

the invention after all, a total blockhead of lunatic porportions.

“Okay, so say I wanted to go to a beach somewhere in the

Carob Being, I’d just set this lil robot thingy to 51Z mode and

turn the transmission on!” A look of horror echoed from Earnest’s face to

Jumple’s face who could still barely contain his smile but tried.

“NO NO NO! You’re going to be blown off course into

the middle of nowhere! In 51Z mode, the robot spews out

ham sandwhiches!” shouted Earnest.

“Mmm..ham sandwhiches!” said Jumple licking his chops,

and pushing the random fire button. Ham sandwhiches

began to rain down onto the kingdom like condensed eggdrop soup,

and the robot zoomed at 290 billion miles per second, carrying Jumple

literally from continent to continent and yes, he was blown off course,

far off into a distant country due to the robot’s intense speed. Luckily

for Jumple, the people of this country were starving for a bite of food. A

young boy named Zync, saw the flying fox cub and pointed it out to

his mother, who was a SNIBB.

“That’s just a strange looking airship dear, not your friend

Jumple!” said Zync’s oblivious mother. A ham sandwhich landed in her

face. Zync’s mother realized that this flying phenomenon really

WAS Jumple J. Squirt being flown like a human kite! Soon the entire town

was all abuzz and running around in circles screaming! When ham sandwhiches

began to come out of nowhere, many people thought they were hallucinating

food. But soon they realized their dreams had come true, and the people

of this remote rural community were to be malnourished no more. They cheered and

gave thanks to the flying creature and when he landed, he was held up by

a large crowd cheering for him. Jumple tried to be humble, but he craved

attention and praise. Then he finally decided to be modest, since

Earnest’s profits and business earnings were at an all time low.

“It is not the one known as I who gave you these ham sandwhiches

that spew before you all on this fine sunny blusterous windy yet somewhat humid day. It is a friend of mine. Someone we all

know and hate, I mean love! Ahem! Someone we all either love or hate, Earnest Endeaver, the Splootonian

scientist on the far edge of this magic kingdom!” declared Jumple

with a look of pride.

“It was his invention that saved you all. And so I ask that you

thank him, rather than a lowly peasent such as the one known as

me!”, Jumple continued. So the crowd gathered together to send

large donations of money to Earnest Endeaver’s inventive corperation,

and soon they had raised over 100 billion gill coins. But then, on the

other side of the village, a large rampaging angry mob of vegeterians came swarming

in like ladybugs after Jumple. Jumple immediately gained support from Zync, who wasn’t

a vegetarian and they both fled from the ravenous terror mongering angry mob of veggie loving savages, who were carrying lit torches and meat cleavers (wait, weren’t they vegetarians?). Luckily, Jumple

and his best friend Zync escaped the town in one piece. They banged into

a tree on their way back into the Sploot Kingdom Courtyard however,

and were knocked unconcious. When they awoke, they found themselves

in a forest out in the middle of nowhere. The invention that had saved over 1 billion

starving villagers was smashed and torn to ribbons, by what appeared to be

chimera tooth marks.

“Wa…wa…where are we?” asked Zync, looking up into the sky, feeling

very woozy and mysteriously mystified. Jumple saw a sign that read “Forest of the Evil Chimeras”. Jumple turned back his head at Zync, and told him:

“According to that there sign, we’re in uhh…the Forest

of the Evil Chipmunks, I mean chimeras! Yeah, that be

the one!”. They were both foggy headed and somewhat disoriented, but Zync

remembered this area from a dream he once had when he was three years old. Zync

told him of his wonderful dream of finding a lost adorable baby chimera in a forest and

raising it as his own and giving a name unto the little one, Freddy, and of how

one day, his dream came true. Suddenly there

was some rustling in the bushes, and out came a hungry chimera!!! The cat like beast

hissed and growled towards Jumple, and spewed forth three vociferous fire balls! Once again,Zync and Jumple were on the run from danger.

“Zync, remember that time I told you that I laugh in the face of jeopardy?

FORGET IT! That’s ancient history!” said Jumple running for his very life

from Zync’s fully grown pet chimera Freddy. Jumple tripped over a log and

fell into a swamp, Zync was running so quickly he didn’t notice, but

while he was fleeing he grabbed the map that Jumple had dropped. When he

had left the forest, he shouted Jumple’s name but there was no response. Zync

decided then and there that his own pet chimera had all but eaten his

closest companion next to his three year old pigtailed sister Twoodleberry. Zync took the remains of the smashed invention, and the map with him, in case they might come

in handy. For a four year old boy, Zync knew a lot about survival in the wilderness,

and about how to make due with the resources at foot and hand. He saw a huge

world spreading out before him like peanut butter as he ventured out into

the unknown. This was truly the most remarkable moment in Zync’s life. He traversed

up a long and winding road, when suddenly he came to the fork in the road. The

fork in the road informed Zync that Prophet Snudd’s house was directly to the right

of where he was standing. Zync thanked the faithful fork named Frank, and made

his way into the tent of the wise but feeble minded old prophet who was profiting

off of all of his various and arguabley looney prophecies. When he entered the

tent, he saw many wooden eating utensils and Prophet Snudd was in the

lotus position meditating when Zync had just barged in.

“BLESS MY 498 BILLION YEAR OLD BEARD! What’s making that

racket?” asked Prophet Snudd, looking down at a tiny brown haired kid

about the age of 4.

“ZYNC, old laddie buck, what brings you here? Did you bring

the components you usually bring to help me better prophesize? The

magic football? The ear cleaning implements? No? You didn’t? What

a shame. Aww it be no big deal. Take your coat off and stay for a while!”

said Prophet Snudd. Zync of course had no coat on, this was just something

that Snelder J. Snudd enjoyed saying to any visitor who dared enter

his sacred tent.

“Make yourself at home, and don’t forget to scratch

my cat Mooshy’s ears!” said Snudd, scratching his pet cat

Mooshy’s ears. Mooshy was a small white fluffy cat, who was

Prophet Snudd’s constant escort. Mooshy, being a pedigree,

always thought herself smarter than her master, and had a huge

ego for a kitten.

“Don’t scratch my left ear! Scratch my RIGHT ear!” hissed Mooshy

in cat language. Noeone seemed to notice this proclamation, and Prophet

Snudd began to mumble and rant for what seemed like hours about

giants and evil wizards and gizzards and blizzards and lizards and dragons and knights

and stone slabs, football, pixies, elves, kings, queens, kingdoms, fairies, the KC royals and the works. When this was all done, Prophet Snudd revealed to Zync a century old

prophecy.

“Zync, I’m afraid I have some disconcerting news. My evil half

cousin Jafistaward is attempting to command an army of 198 thousand

million monsters. He’s stolen my most powerful monster summoning

potion so there is virtually no way for me to counter attack his

wicked ways. I know you’ve saved this kingdom at least once

or twice before, and I understand you have a map. May I see it?” asked

the finicky Prophet Snudd shaking his hands getting down on his

knees and begging for the map. What appeared to be a map was

actually a love poem entitled “Elegy to Peanut Brittle”, by Jumple Jelly

Squirt.

“Darn that moronic Jumple going through the trouble of placing

a rubber band and trying his best to disguise a love poem written

about peanut brittle as an ancient scroll! Ahem. Pardon me. Well,

Zync, all I know is Jafistaward’s potion that he stole from me is

a monster making marvel of the new millineum. If you can’t retrieve

it, we’ll be overun and severely wounded, or even worse,

badly scarred! So something must be done about this

evil Jafistaward doomsday prophet fellow! His castle isn’t

that far from here but he’s used the magic potion to

create a barrier sealing off all entry! The only means of

obtaining an item to break that barrier is the Sword of Truth

that used to be green tinted! And the only way to find that sword would

be to have some sort of air travel. Let me see if I can redesign that smashed

video game system of yours!” said Prophet Snudd grabbing the huge

smashed invention out of Zync’s tiny gnome like hands. Prophet Snudd

sat around for several hundred days, trying to piece it back together, and

finally it was accomplished. The 498 year old prophet who was cyrogenically

preserved by dinosaur scientists handed over the fixed machine and the

robot that came with it and assembled both of them. When they were finished,

he explained how to use the robot and the inhabitable kite in sync, and all

the ins and outs of proper vehicle maintence. Prophet Snudd also supplied Zync with

a large bulky powerful and flexible metal spoon to use against evil monsters and the liking.

“I’ll teell yew if I heave succeeess on my jewerney to defueat

Jafistawurd and sooave the Sploot Wingdom!” said Zync setting

off into the wilderness of blue yonder.

“And I’ll tell you if I ever remember what I had forgotten

to not tell you three days ago!” said Prophet Snudd waving Zync

goodbye. Will Zync succeed? Only time and wise old

bearded prophets will tell.

Chapter 3: Zync’s Journey

Zync was sitting under a waterfall thinking about various things. Just contimplating

and thinking and planning ahead for the rest of the journey’s outcome. He thought

about how Earnest A. Endeaver would be the most famous moof man alive if it was

his invention that helped a hero save the entire Sploot Kingdom. He felt a lot

of responsibility on his hands, so he washed them under the waterfall, but

there was still quite a bit left. He began fiddiling around with the automaton,

and reprogramming it to go back to the Forest of the Evil Chimeras, in hopes

of finding Jumple, the foolish messenger that had served as Zync’s older

brother. When Zync stepped into the fully inhabitable kite, he began

zooming at implausible speeds, and crash landed right in the swamp

that Jumple had fell in.