Love Life Talk

[Redeemer]

The best (or most painfull) part of this is that we still talk to one another. However, she continues to tell me that "she never really felt a love connection" and that "she pitys me". Meanwhile, say I do not respond to (and email for instance) her, she begins to ask me why I am not responding. Does anyone get this? She claims she does not want to be with me anymore, yet clearly is clinging to me. She claims she does not want to "deal with me" and yet, she wants my attention.

What a mess.....

She's playing the "I'm going to pretend I don't want you so that you'll want me" card. Women are good at it. I don't practise it myself, I believe in honesty, but I have lost a couple of past bfs to these kinds of women. She's pestering you, yet when you attempt to respond she says she pities you and never loved you? That's harsh, and unfair.

To be honest, I think she just wants your attention, and she wants you to think about her. How did you take the break up? If you were cool and calm about it, that may have annoyed her. She would have wanted you to feel like it was the end of the world. She obviously thinks highly of herself, and she wants you to hurt over her.

[Guest Para Astaroth]

Doing a few sketches of some of the FC's I introduced (Lazarus and what not.  Maybe a new outfit for a few of my older ones) and drawing the cover art for my recent fanfiction, "Kursed:  Requiem."  I'm currently sketching the lettering for the title.

[Thu'um]

She's playing the "I'm going to pretend I don't want you so that you'll want me" card. Women are good at it. I don't practise it myself, I believe in honesty, but I have lost a couple of past bfs to these kinds of women. She's pestering you, yet when you attempt to respond she says she pities you and never loved you? That's harsh, and unfair.

To be honest, I think she just wants your attention, and she wants you to think about her. How did you take the break up? If you were cool and calm about it, that may have annoyed her. She would have wanted you to feel like it was the end of the world. She obviously thinks highly of herself, and she wants you to hurt over her.

Yes, you see. i would have never have gussed this  :facepalm:

[StarFoxfan-FUR_ever]

She's playing the "I'm going to pretend I don't want you so that you'll want me" card. Women are good at it. I don't practise it myself, I believe in honesty, but I have lost a couple of past bfs to these kinds of women. She's pestering you, yet when you attempt to respond she says she pities you and never loved you? That's harsh, and unfair.

To be honest, I think she just wants your attention, and she wants you to think about her. How did you take the break up? If you were cool and calm about it, that may have annoyed her. She would have wanted you to feel like it was the end of the world. She obviously thinks highly of herself, and she wants you to hurt over her.

Actually, neither of us took the breakup well at all. Right now she's going through that "I never want to get married to anyone...especially you, and you cant change my mind" phase. It's just kind of pathetic how she has been stuck in that phase for over a year, you know? (You'd figure if she really didnt want to be with me, she would have moved on....)

But that only confuses me further. If she really does want to be with me (and she definantly knows I care about her) why won't she just drop the act?

["User"]

Yes, you see. i would have never have gussed this 

Picking up on things like this is a skill you learn as you go.  Don't feel bad about not getting it. :)

[Thu'um]

oh i don't :trollface:

[Redeemer]

Actually, neither of us took the breakup well at all. Right now she's going through that "I never want to get married to anyone...especially you, and you cant change my mind" phase. It's just kind of pathetic how she has been stuck in that phase for over a year, you know? (You'd figure if she really didnt want to be with me, she would have moved on....)

But that only confuses me further. If she really does want to be with me (and she definantly knows I care about her) why won't she just drop the act?

She's wanting to hurt you. She wants you to think "Damn, how did I let that hot little piece of ass go?" when really, you're seeing how pathetic she is. I think she's angry because you're over it, and she's not, and she wants you to feel what she feels. If she does want you back, would you take her? Because in my opinion, that would be foolish. It honestly looks like she's trying to "hurt you back into liking her". It's a strange thing some people do, men and women. A basic string of events happens like this:

Guy and girl date

Guy and girl break up

Guy gets over it, girl hints at trying again

Guy says no or doesn't respond

Girl pulls the "So what, I didn't like you any way!" card (except in this case, it's a lot more cruel than that)

It can happen both ways, guys can do it to, I've been put through the same thing as you, StarfoxfanFURever. It's a reaction of your coolness/non-response/no thanks I think we should stay apart. A reaction of embarrassment and wanting to hurt someone for not giving you what you wanted. Don't get me wrong, girls are a lot more prone to this than guys, but you do see the odd jealous and embarrassed male who goes out of his way to hurt an ex.

I dated this guy who used to live upstairs from my block, and after we broke up (he dumped me actually) he went crazy. First of all, it was suicide threats, he went to the Tay Bridge and threatened to jump off it, for a number of reasons. Basically, his friends were sick of him because he was moping around and being lame, so they stopped inviting him out and he went crazy at that. He was (apparently) asking my friends what I was up to, who was I with, had I found someone new, where was my new hanging out spot. I met some friends in a club who said to me "Jesus, we met your ex the other day and it was just 20 questions about you, seriously". That creeped me out. Then he started spending all his money on booze and stopped paying his rent, which has now left his old room mates in trouble. And then, the biggest thing happened.

I got over him and proceeded to find someone new. And I did, but then he ignored me, and then I met someone else, the day after he ignored me too. This happened 4 times and eventually I was really upset, because I thought something was wrong with me. I was convinced I was unattractive, so I confided in my friend about it, and he was like "Wait a sec, who were your supposed to be dating?" and I listed the names of the guys I had met over that month. My friend looked at me, his face changed from confusion to anger, and he hugged me. These guys were my ex's new friends, apparently. He told me how my ex had seen me talking to these people, then when I went to go chat with my other friends, he had approached the guy and told him I was a psycho, that he had left me and I had hospitalised myself, I was a stalker, I used to threated him, etc. All lies. And they were all friends together, my ex slowly building an "anti-me" army, and at first I couldn't believe it. But I did my reasearch, asked questions, and I found out exactly what had happened. My ex had been out with his friends at the same time I was out with my friends, and watched me. See, the club we go to is the only club in town that plays the music we like, and we do share some friends still. Then he had turned the guy I had met against me so that I couldn't move on. I was sickened by how creepy that was, plus it made me too scared to talk to guys because I knew I was being watched and I didn't want someone else thinking I was a headcase.

Eventually I met someone at Hallowe'en, who I'm still with. I told him what happened before, and warned him of my ex, but he said that if anyone tries to talk crap about me to him, he'll knock them to the floor. And that's okay with me.

Now my ex has hardly any friends, and he has debt collectors chasing him, so I get the last laugh here. I knew there would be consequences of dating a slightly younger guy, I should have followed my gut feeling and turned him down. Anyway, that's a true (and super dramatic) story for you. I wish I had exaggerated, haha. I don't go to that club anymore either, because my ex still goes there and I just don't want him to see me. I hate knowing that people talk crap about me.

Lol, ajc3000fox, I have learned from both my exes and my friends, what people are capable of. I know some girls that have treated a guy badly, and I myself have had my share of drama with my exes because I'm a total pushover. You'll see when you're older. :P

[Sapphire]

Wow....can ya'll feel the drama in the air? :lol:

[Redeemer]

Wow....can ya'll feel the drama in the air?

Dude, you should have tried being me around that time, it was hell on earth.

[Thu'um]

or mabye it it was earth in hell :(

[Redeemer]

or mabye it it was earth in hell

You know what honey, that's a scary thought. :(

[Sabre]

Wow. What a nutter. That said, I can imagine no one would want to let you go. 

Also, that guy you're seeing atm. Total psyco. don't worry though. I know an anti social fat man who can look after you. :P

[Redeemer]

Wow. What a nutter. That said, I can imagine no one would want to let you go. 

Also, that guy you're seeing atm. Total psyco. don't worry though. I know an anti social fat man who can look after you.

That's like, the sweetest and funniest comment ever, you made me smile. Thanks Sabre. :D

[Vrance Movado]

:|A relashionship I had going on for 6 years ended so badly yesterday. I actually thought of suicide. But I then got to think, there are better things in life than just that one girl that broke my heart. Someone I said I loved for 6 years. Lost to a friend I considered my brother. Im still having a hard time trying to move on but heck, Im only 17 theres more time to find that one person to call yours. But even thought there are many to support me, 6 long happy years of my life given to a person who didnt value what she had untill she lost it all. Its bad enough I lost a childhood friend a year ago and the dad thought it was my fault, but now this, another friend scratched from my heart. Yes I know its not like me to express myself to everyone like this, specially here on a public place as this. Well thats how its going so far. Now the only things that haunt me are the memories and moments I had with her.

[Redeemer]

Aw man, that's awful, I'm so sorry. *hugs* 6 years is a long time. If you ever have silly thoughts, please talk to someone, even me. I'm a mental health nurse so maybe I can help you. Just keep your chin up, as you said, 17 is young - there are plenty more fish in the sea, so forget about your whale. :)

[EazyIN]

Well if this helps you, I haven't had a GF in over 14 years...

[Vrance Movado]

Well thanks Redemer. And wow 14 years. Still you didnt have someone as close as me and her once where.

[EazyIN]

Nope not once. I came close once. But I usually scare everyone with my gory zombie stories to shut them up about it  :trollface:

[Vrance Movado]

Heh not much of an peoples person are you? I think we should get back on topic.

[EazyIN]

Well I be as nice as I can tot eh chicks I like but they toss me aside like everyone else *looks over school destruction plan* Yep I'm just there to fill in space 

[Vrance Movado]

Well I guess you need to act more natural. Be yourself not a fake apperance. Im not going to be datin any time soon. Specially since that just happend yesterday. Oh man. Memories need to die down before they kill me. I just need to move on, but its easier said than done. I really do miss her. Makes me wonder what she thinks of what just happened. Does she care? Did she EVER care? Does she even ever love me or just play with my thoughts? Things like this still run throught my head. Thats how suicide came to my head. One way to end it all. The memories, the time we spent together, everything. Still that thougt is in the back of my mind. I may have overcome it once but I still think about it.

[Nexus]

Well I guess you need to act more natural. Be yourself not a fake apperance. Im not going to be datin any time soon. Specially since that just happend yesterday. Oh man. Memories need to die down before they kill me. I just need to move on, but its easier said than done. I really do miss her. Makes me wonder what she thinks of what just happened. Does she care? Did she EVER care? Does she even ever love me or just play with my thoughts? Things like this still run throught my head. Thats how suicide came to my head. One way to end it all. The memories, the time we spent together, everything. Still that thougt is in the back of my mind. I may have overcome it once but I still think about it.

kinda graphic :/

["User"]

I need to get another girlfriend....but I'm been too lazy recently to put in the effort.  :)

[Vrance Movado]

6 years relashion not a month thing User.

[Sapphire]

I still can't get over my last break up :/