Love Life Talk

[Sapphire]

Wait... nude pics of what? What's going on? I'm tired so I can't brain very well right now.

What do you think moron? (Joking! )

And I haven't done this yet, I'm just wondering if it would make a relationship unhealthy.

["User"]

This is completely out of curiousness but would maybe nude pics be consider unhealthy?

This early in the relationship?  Yes.

[The Shaper]

This early in the relationship?  Yes.

Yeah wait until you get bored of her  :trollface:

[Sapphire]

Yeah wait until you get bored of her 

This early in the relationship?  Yes.

Explain.

[The Shaper]

I'm sorry there's just no way I couldn't have said that.

[Vy'drach]

What do you think moron? (Joking! )

And I haven't done this yet, I'm just wondering if it would make a relationship unhealthy.

Figured you could be talking about having porn around as well.

Nude pics of her, probably best to wait. Never been in that situation myself, but I imagine that's something that more happens than you being determined to make it happen.

[Xortberg]

This post is necessary.

Hey guys, what would you consider an unhealthy relationship?

I mean, would you consider a relationship with everything but sex unhealthy?

Or...what? Comments please!

As long as both people are truly happy, it's healthy. If both you and your partner want nothing but sex, then a sex-based relationship is healthy. Of course, very few people could be happy with an all-sex relationship, since humans really need more than that, so in most cases I suppose it would be unhealthy.

A healthy relationship... it's hard to really define it. It would differ from person to person. I suppose the most important part in making both partners happy would be a mutual respect for what each side can bring to the other. We want to find people who can compliment our existing traits, while maybe providing some traits that we don't possess. For example:

Dude A - A generally athletic guy, very nice for the most part, but also very opinionated and likes to express his points of view and discuss opposing sides - has a choice between Chick A and Chick B

Chick A - Is a shy, quiet girl who really doesn't like to discuss opposing viewpoints as it tends to bring about conflict, and she prefers to avoid it. She's very nice, and tries to please everyone.

Chick B - Somewhat nerdy, but very outspoken, and doesn't mind the occasional conflict - she's thick skinned, and can look past a few butted heads. She likes to discuss her views as well.

Of the two girls, B would definitely make a better partner than A - in my opinion, of course. She compliments his existing traits nicely, and adds some that he doesn't have. It will, I believe, lead to a happier relationship.

Of course, humans are way more complex than that, and my over-simplified example can't quite capture the true essence of how this stuff works, but you get the picture.

Of course, keep in mind that I have very little love life experience myself, so this is all just me making an educated guess.

[Sapphire]

As long as both people are truly happy, it's healthy.

I can already tell you messed up. I think I know somebody who can help....*Rings bell*...Jeeves?

[Xortberg]

I can already tell you messed up. I think I know somebody who can help....*Rings bell*...Jeeves?

How is that messing up? If you love someone, you want them to be happy, no? So if sex make both sides truly happy, it's a healthy relationship.

["User"]

I can already tell you messed up. I think I know somebody who can help....*Rings bell*...Jeeves?

Haha, yeah I was going to say the same thing at that one.

We'll talk more tomorrow about this Robcot94 when I'm not really tired.

How is that messing up? If you love someone, you want them to be happy, no? So if sex make both sides truly happy, it's a healthy relationship.

Only sex doesn't make both sides "truly happy".  Most relationships based primarily on sex end up...you know...ending a lot earlier then they should.  Stats and facts back this up - the sooner sexual activity begins in a relationship the more likely it is to end early.

Hence the high divorce rate in the U.S.  People don't have the same "purer" motives that they used to.

[Sapphire]

Haha, yeah I was going to say the same thing at that one.

We'll talk more tomorrow about this Robcot94 when I'm not really tired.

Well that works too, night bud. :)

[Xortberg]

Only sex doesn't make both sides "truly happy".  Most relationships based primarily on sex end up...you know...ending a lot earlier then they should.  Stats and facts back this up - the sooner sexual activity begins in a relationship the more likely it is to end early.

Hence the high divorce rate in the U.S.  People don't have the same "purer" motives that they used to.

Of course sex alone doesn't make people happy. I was simply answering the question of "Is a sex based relationship healthy?" I even admitted in that very same post that humans are far too complex for sex alone to make both sides happy. That was just an IF both sides were expressly interested in sex.

["User"]

Of course sex alone doesn't make people happy. I was simply answering the question of "Is a sex based relationship healthy?" I even admitted in that very same post that humans are far too complex for sex alone to make both sides happy. That was just an IF both sides were expressly interested in sex.

If that's the case then "relationship" wouldn't be the best word to describe it (IMO of course).  Otherwise in theory you'd be correct,

[Guest Para Astaroth]

To be honest, I don't believe sex would solve anything in a relationship.  In all honesty, I call sex a pass time option that can be either done or done without.  But, I don't really believe it would improve on the relationship thing since the girl I'm going to be dating pretty soon said she didn't want to do it, and I respect every word she has on it.  'Cause, once you do it, you can't take it back; it goes, it's gone (If you know what I'm talking and coming from about)

[Xortberg]

If that's the case then "relationship" wouldn't be the best word to describe it (IMO of course).  Otherwise in theory you'd be correct,

Yeah, I suppose I should have made it clearer what I was getting at. I'll make a point to do so in the future. And speaking purely semantics, any interaction between two or more entities would be considered a 'relationship'. That's not what we're getting at here, though, so I'm mostly just blowing hot air at this point.

To be honest, I don't believe sex would solve anything in a relationship.  In all honesty, I call sex a pass time option that can be either done or done without.  But, I don't really believe it would improve on the relationship thing since the girl I'm going to be dating pretty soon said she didn't want to do it, and I respect every word she has on it.  'Cause, once you do it, you can't take it back; it goes, it's gone (If you know what I'm talking and coming from about)

I do understand what you're saying, and you're right to an extent. Still, on a biological level, humans as a species desire sex, if only to pass their genes on to the next generation. Of course, humans having higher thought processes that most animals, we can generally repress these simple urges and seek something else, so you're still more or less correct.

[Guest Para Astaroth]

I do understand what you're saying, and you're right to an extent. Still, on a biological level, humans as a species desire sex, if only to pass their genes on to the next generation. Of course, humans having higher thought processes that most animals, we can generally repress these simple urges and seek something else, so you're still more or less correct.

I mean, shoot, I'm 18 and I still haven't lost my virginity.  But, you don't see me complaining about it nor do I go around asking for it to be lost.  A lot of people are wondering why I haven't lost mine -- friends in school -- and I simply tell them it doesn't interest me like most people.  They give me 'the weird look' and say, "ooookkaaayyyy."  I nodd, "Say I'm weird -- I don't think it would solve anything in a relationship."

[Xortberg]

I's a virgin too. Not necessarily because I'm not interested, I just have no attraction to the people I go to school with, so I have no desire to bang them. There was one girl I liked, but I got friendzoned, so I'm pretty much set on waiting till college.

[Sabre]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casual_relationship

[Steve]

Offtopic- remember we have the other love life talk topic in the mature section of the forum to address more "intimate" things about love. Not that we are on the border to make this topic not pg-15, but still, be careful  .

Ontopic- don't care if the guys around highschool make fun of you because you still haven't lost it. At least you are not one of those unfortunate dudes that get to be a dad at 18.

[Guest Para Astaroth]

Ontopic- don't care if the guys around highschool make fun of you because you still haven't lost it. At least you are not one of those unfortunate dudes that get to be a dad at 18.

Yeah, no joke.  I mean, we guys have all had that urge, but certain kinds -- like on this site -- know when to turn off that 'switch' and move on.  I can do it fairly easy while the other intimate guys at my school just flip theirs on in an instant, and are always all over that one girl.  Even for a high schooler for my age, it's ridiculous!  I really don't pay attention to it as much as I use to, but sometimes I just have to look over at those certain guys and just laugh to myself at how blind they are (Catch my drift?).

[Guest Julius Quasar]

Offtopic- remember we have the other love life talk topic in the mature section of the forum to address more "intimate" things about love. Not that we are on the border to make this topic not pg-15, but still, be careful  .

Ontopic- don't care if the guys around highschool make fun of you because you still haven't lost it. At least you are not one of those unfortunate dudes that get to be a dad at 18.

Oh, shit, sorry about that! 

*removes previous post*

[Steve]

Oh, shit, sorry about that! 

*removes previous post*

err dude, there was nothing wrong with that post xD, put it back.

[Guest Julius Quasar]

Oh...OH, I see.

As for putting it back, I...kinda...can't xD

[Sabre]

Yeah, no joke.  I mean, we guys have all had that urge, but certain kinds -- like on this site -- know when to turn off that 'switch' and move on.  I can do it fairly easy while the other intimate guys at my school just flip theirs on in an instant, and are always all over that one girl.  Even for a high schooler for my age, it's ridiculous!  I really don't pay attention to it as much as I use to, but sometimes I just have to look over at those certain guys and just laugh to myself at how blind they are (Catch my drift?).

No, I don't, not in the slightest.

["User"]

Explain.

You are still in the very early stages of a relationship which, from what you've implied, you really want to work out over the long run.  That being said sex or anything sexual period too early is never a good idea (unless, like Xort said, that's the only reason for being in one).  You two should be focusing on communication, trust, etc and developing strong roots from the get go to build up a solid foundation.  From my own personal experience in serious relationships sexuality too early has almost always had negative consequences (if not in the short term then the long term).  Everyone is different though and while sexuality in a relationship (before marriage) doesn't always lead to some sort of downfall long term after only three weeks??  I think it's safe to say you know what to do.  :wink: