Conall Drest Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 I pretty much hate online relationships, because whenever I do get one I am never attracted to the girl I'm with because it's extremely hard for me to find someone attractive. Plus being a closeted fur, it's extremely hard for me to find people who will accept that, along with the fandom being 90% gay and bisexual I don't find anyone there being one of the few straight furs. Sure I'm unhappy single but whenever I have a crush on a girl I feel 100% worse, it's like I don't want to be in love or something. IRL it would be probably easier for me to get someone than I do online because online I seem like an "emo" or "goth" to people, which is why every single girlfriend I've had was either emo or goth and never normal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoctorAllosaurus Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 So one of my co-workers asked me if I wanted to be her boyfriend today. I'm not entirely sure if she was joking or not, but it did come out of the blue so... If she is being serious, then this couldn't have happened at a worse time, mostly due to me being a loser. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"User" Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 So one of my co-workers asked me if I wanted to be her boyfriend today. I'm not entirely sure if she was joking or not, but it did come out of the blue so... If she is being serious, then this couldn't have happened at a worse time, mostly due to me being a loser. If she's being serious you shouldn't feel like a loser in the slighest. If anything this should be a morale boost to you. I learned a LOT from my first relationship and it's made me a better person as a result - even if there were a lot of "growing pains" from it. Besides, females will typically see their new BF's as a "project" of sorts and do their best to try and improve them. Well, maybe not ALL women but true relationships are like that. Both partners try and improve on the other. Anyways, keep us up to date if it's serious or not and we can try and help you out. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gene Inari Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Never thought I'd have to use this thread, but oh well. I could use some of SF-O's input on my situation. In a few months (this August), I'm going to be making a trip down southwest to New Mexico to meet and visit a handful of long time internet friends that live in the same town. Two of them are already a couple and I'm staying at the third friend's place for the bulk of my stay. Here's the interesting part, the friend I'm staying with is a girl and she's aware that I'm interested in her. I've asked her once before about a relationship when I was having a difficult time in my life. It was hastily asked and both of us mutually agreed that it just wasn't a good idea nor was it a good time. At the time that I asked, my friend was waiting on a previous relationship to pick up and she was determined to hold out for it. I myself was a bit of an emotinal wreck on account of my father passing away. Since then, the guy she was waiting on did come back for a time, but he came back and basically said to her, "I've outgrown the relationship. Seeya." and that was that. She's also going to having a birthday (19) while I'm there. The question running through my head, "Is should I ask her to be my girlfriend" again? While a rejection would certainly suck, I'm having my apprehensions about getting a yes as well, because as soon as my visit is done it's going to be another long distance relationship for the both of us. Part of me is unwilling to put both through all the troubles it entails, despite how rewarding it might be. Another part of me just simply wants this. The thing with her previous boyfriend is also relatively recent and I don't want to run into "too soon" problems. Put simply, I know what I want, but I'm having my doubts and reservations. I want to just go in and dive at the issue, but there are also thoughts in my head that say "hold on and wait." So what do you think, SF-O? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoctorAllosaurus Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Looks like we're going to go out one of these nights, but just as friends though. I'd like to get to know her better before I make any tough decisions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"User" Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Looks like we're going to go out one of these nights, but just as friends though. I'd like to get to know her better before I make any tough decisions. Always a good idea. I hope it all works out for you! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redeemer Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Besides, females will typically see their new BF's as a "project" of sorts and do their best to try and improve them. What? How is that so? The reason my relationships end is because the guy changes into something I don't like, and is a completely different person from when we first started going out. The last thing I want is for them to change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Posted May 30, 2011 Share Posted May 30, 2011 If she's being serious you shouldn't feel like a loser in the slighest. If anything this should be a morale boost to you. I learned a LOT from my first relationship and it's made me a better person as a result - even if there were a lot of "growing pains" from it. Besides, females will typically see their new BF's as a "project" of sorts and do their best to try and improve them. Well, maybe not ALL women but true relationships are like that. Both partners try and improve on the other. Anyways, keep us up to date if it's serious or not and we can try and help you out. If you are staying with her, just hold on and wait kinda the day before you leave or something, because if things get awkward, you will spoil your trip, unless she makes the move, of course :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"User" Posted May 30, 2011 Share Posted May 30, 2011 What? How is that so? The reason my relationships end is because the guy changes into something I don't like, and is a completely different person from when we first started going out. The last thing I want is for them to change. I was a being a little sarcastic with that part, I got the idea from a Dilbert comic. :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thu'um Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 any way, going to high school next year, and since i went to a private school for 3 years, i won't know any one except mabye a few kids, making a love life easier and harder at the same time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drasiana Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 I was a being a little sarcastic with that part, I got the idea from a Dilbert comic. Scott Adams is a raging misogynist, so I'd advise against getting ideas from him in the future. The bit you "suggested" there is a rediculously unhealthy approach to relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"User" Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Scott Adams is a raging misogynist, so I'd advise against getting ideas from him in the future. The bit you "suggested" there is a rediculously unhealthy approach to relationships. It's a comic strip...that's the LAST place anyone would usually look for relationship advice... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drasiana Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Scott Adams himself preaches rediculously sexist stuff on his own terms though, like comparing women to children and the mentally handicapped and saying that's why equal rights aren't worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thu'um Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 well, i learn somthing new every day :mellow: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"User" Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Scott Adams himself preaches rediculously sexist stuff on his own terms though, like comparing women to children and the mentally handicapped and saying that's why equal rights aren't worth it. Well, whatever his disposition on a variety of issues it's common practice for comic strip writers to put their own views of things in their comics. I'm not agreeing with him obviously though on these points. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thu'um Posted June 10, 2011 Share Posted June 10, 2011 (edited) :trollface: post that here and let you guys figure it out edit: Friend of mine is going out with lucy, i don't really care as we haven't talked in the longest time. But i am not happy for him iether Edited June 11, 2011 by ajc3000fox Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoctorAllosaurus Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 I'm pathetic, I keep making excuses not to go out. Maybe I'm a coward, maybe I know deep down inside that... I just don't know anymore, maybe I should just give up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"User" Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 Try not to make excuses and take the plunge! Even in the worst case scenario's you will learn from your experience which will give you a better experience next time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StarFoxfan-FUR_ever Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 So what I get from both Gene and Allosaurus is that you find yourselves in a position where you are questioning whether or not the risk/reward aspect of the relationship is really worth it. From what I understand, the good aspects of the relationship and the bad aspects of the relationship seem to be in perfect balance, so you are not left with a pre-determined disposition or a prefferable scenario to begin with. And so, you are stuck in a "yes and no" situation where you can't decide because either you are scared, or the risk/reward dosen't seem worth it. Gene should try to get to know this girl as another has said a few comments ago. Forcing the issue isn't exactly ideal in most cases I believe. My relationship with my ex fell apart because we each expected too much from it so early in the relationship, regardless of the fact that we promised for certain events to occur in their proper order. Even with this pre-determined list of what's and when's set in place, it became frustrating after a while and we became over-anxious. (Although I will argue if we were allowed to spend time together outside of school, we would both still be together) Anyways, we didn't break any of these promises to each other, but it still became too stressful after a while. Let it flow naturally is what I have to say. Don't set expectations, you will only have a mental breakdown. Allosaurus, I still have this same issue as I type. I know my chances of getting back together with my ex are slim to none. She insists she wants to be single, yet our conversations lead me to believe she is only playing hard to get, or being a complete jerk. In the meantime, I continue to ponder whether or not it is worth it to move on. She even admits that we were infatuated and that she understands I still have deep feelings for her...etc. This all leads me to be confused such as you are. I find myself wondering sometimes if one of my lifelong friends is actually the one. I wonder if that could just be me being desperate though. Plus, she's got a bright future ahead of her, and I don't want to be some sort of obstacle to her success. Sometimes she accidently says things a certain way that makes me think she's trying to lead me on, but I don't know if that is the case or if she sees me as a friend only. So what I am saying Allousaurus: Go for it. It is a blessing for a woman to be showing interest in you rather than the stereotype of it being the other way around. You are at an advantage compared to me as you know what cards you are being dealt before the game begins. I am in a guessing game at the moment and have no idea what my real options are. Make the most of this opportunity while it lasts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilentEvo Posted June 19, 2011 Share Posted June 19, 2011 currently single, I am. Haven't found the right girl in like a year. :trollface: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoctorAllosaurus Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Okay, so now there's another girl interested in me and I'm not as nervous about it. Something about her gives me a funny feeling that I wasn't getting from the other girl, which might've had something to do with me making lame excuses. Anywho, I've got her number and we're going out to eat when our schedules don't conflict with each other, I'm pretty psyched. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fluxy Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Very cool indeed; I hope things work out. And in other love life news.... I have a conflict on my hands. Milky, or this girl I like... Which one to go for... =[ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deploy Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 I still don't have a girlfriend. YAY. :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Very cool indeed; I hope things work out. And in other love life news.... I have a conflict on my hands. Milky, or this girl I like... Which one to go for... =[ I guess you forgot about me....but Milky is a good replacement , I wish you both the best of the best :unsure: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fluxy Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 I guess you forgot about me....but Milky is a good replacement , I wish you both the best of the best Actually, Sara threatened me, and Milky just isn't that into me, soooo... I don't think me and Milky will work out. XD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts