JCMasterman Posted October 19, 2010 Share Posted October 19, 2010 Well, I never thought I'd do this...but here it is: Chapter 1 of "A Krystal Encounter". There are six chapters so far but for now I'll just submit the first and see how people like it.Keep in mind that it's my first attempt at a fanfic so it might not be the best thing you've ever read. But I've put several months of work into it and I'm still revising every mistake. I'd greatly appreciate any feedback as well, it's all working towards improving my skills as a writer. Since it exceeds the 2000 character length, I'll just include the link to Fanficiton.net where the full story lies.Enjoy my friends. http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6334573/1/A_Krystal_Encounter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest l Shade l Posted October 19, 2010 Share Posted October 19, 2010 That Fan Fic I read was amazing... Astonishing bro keep it up. Best I've read so far.. But the part about the optimous Prime toy justkinda creeped me out...... Literally... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FoxMcCloud Posted October 19, 2010 Share Posted October 19, 2010 Dude that was EPIC!!! I really enjoyed it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 19, 2010 Author Share Posted October 19, 2010 That Fan Fic I read was amazing... Astonishing bro keep it up. Best I've read so far.. But the part about the optimous Prime toy justkinda creeped me out...... Literally...How so? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest l Shade l Posted October 19, 2010 Share Posted October 19, 2010 " I picked up my Optmious Prime robot. " Honestly how old is he 15? I'm 16 so to me seeing someone playing with a toy for 6-12 years old Will kinda creep me out to a point where I'd either wouldn't hang out wit them or I'd be to embarresed to talk to them the next day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 19, 2010 Author Share Posted October 19, 2010 " I picked up my Optmious Prime robot. " Honestly how old is he 15? I'm 16 so to me seeing someone playing with a toy for 6-12 years old Will kinda creep me out to a point where I'd either wouldn't hang out wit them or I'd be to embarresed to talk to them the next day.I know plenty of people that still collect those things as adults. Honestly I don't think it would've been abnormal for the character to like Transformers. But alright, I understand. And yes, he is 16 years old. Having something that reminded him of his past life was the reason he took it along, that's all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest l Shade l Posted October 19, 2010 Share Posted October 19, 2010 I know plenty of people that still collect those things as adults. Honestly I don't think it would've been abnormal for the character to like Transformers. But alright, I understand. And yes, he is 16 years old. Having something that reminded him of his past life was the reason he took it along, that's all.Not saying anything is wrong with it. But for a guy like me and my background. I wouldn't still have those childish things y'know.I'm just saying you'd never see me doing that kind of stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 19, 2010 Author Share Posted October 19, 2010 Oh, I see. No problem. Still I'm glad you liked it. :wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Fox Posted October 20, 2010 Share Posted October 20, 2010 Interesting story. It made sense that Krystal would feel his pain, as she is an empath in the games. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 20, 2010 Author Share Posted October 20, 2010 Interesting story. It made sense that Krystal would feel his pain, as she is an empath in the games.Thanks, I figured that since she was telepathic, she'd be able to sense other's thoughts. Glad you like it. :wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Fox Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 Thanks, I figured that since she was telepathic, she'd be able to sense other's thoughts. Glad you like it. Yeah, it would be awesome to meet Krystal, she's so nice and sweet. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 Yeah, it would be awesome to meet Krystal, she's so nice and sweet. I hear that! :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjrathbun812 Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 This story is cheesy......But some how.....That suits it.....I mean, Everybody in the world would have done the same things if it happened to them. But I have a question........Doesn't Fox have a relationship with Krystal? Wouldn't he care if he found about it all? And also, I totally loled at the, "Okay, making the jump to Hyperspace in three… two…" "What the?" "ONE!" "CRAAAAAP!"This is a very fun story to read...Keep it up! And exactly how long did it take you to write all that......? That was one big chapter man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Green Fox Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 I have trouble believing that was his "first attempt" it was really good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjrathbun812 Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 Maybe he's a skilled writer and didn't know it at first. XD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 This story is cheesy......But some how.....That suits it.....I mean, Everybody in the world would have done the same things if it happened to them. But I have a question........Doesn't Fox have a relationship with Krystal? Wouldn't he care if he found about it all? And also, I totally loled at the, "Okay, making the jump to Hyperspace in three… two…" "What the?" "ONE!" "CRAAAAAP!"This is a very fun story to read...Keep it up! And exactly how long did it take you to write all that......? That was one big chapter man.So far (after revising everything and fixing the mistakes) it's taken me several months to write the whole thing so far. But the first chapter, that was just in my head one night and I had to write about it. Also, I do acknowledge that was in love with before me; if you read chapter 2 then you would understand. But if you haven't then I won't spoil anything. And I swear this was my first attempt at a fanfic. I mostly kept a journal and wrote down random ideas for stories...but none of them stuck. Then I made a go at this, and I can't begin to describe how proud I am. Apparently people at Fanfiction.net have already thought of a theme song for the story: "Second Chance" by Shinedown. I couldn't agree with them more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 Expect a very lengthy review soon. Xort and I are putting it together. End of next week at the latest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 22, 2010 Author Share Posted October 22, 2010 Expect a very lengthy review soon. Xort and I are putting it together. End of next week at the latest.Wow...thanks. I don't know what to say. Didn't think anyone would take the time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Shaper Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 Wow...thanks. I don't know what to say. Didn't think anyone would take the time! I don't think you understand what they mean, it could be good review, or it could be a bad review. My money is on bad review. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 22, 2010 Author Share Posted October 22, 2010 I don't think you understand what they mean, it could be good review, or it could be a bad review. My money is on bad review.Heh, I guess reality creeps in in unsuspecting ways... If it's a bad review, I'll take the criticism and revise whatever they didn't like. If it's a good review, then I'll use that as a stepping stone to continue writing. A win-win if you ask me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjrathbun812 Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 So far (after revising everything and fixing the mistakes) it's taken me several months to write the whole thing so far. But the first chapter, that was just in my head one night and I had to write about it. Also, I do acknowledge that was in love with before me; if you read chapter 2 then you would understand. But if you haven't then I won't spoil anything. And I swear this was my first attempt at a fanfic. I mostly kept a journal and wrote down random ideas for stories...but none of them stuck. Then I made a go at this, and I can't begin to describe how proud I am. Apparently people at Fanfiction.net have already thought of a theme song for the story: "Second Chance" by Shinedown. I couldn't agree with them more.Oh, I didn't know that there was a "next" button. I thought you were gunna give more links or something....My bad!I read the second chapter now. Lookin' good! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCMasterman Posted October 22, 2010 Author Share Posted October 22, 2010 Oh, I didn't know that there was a "next" button. I thought you were gunna give more links or something....My bad!I read the second chapter now. Lookin' good!Yeah, all six chapters are there. Just click the "next" button. :wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest l Shade l Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 I don't think you understand what they mean, it could be good review, or it could be a bad review. My money is on bad review.Ya I agree with you on that Emperor.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjrathbun812 Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 :shock: :shock: :shock: I KNEW THAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN! :D I READ THE THIRD CHAPTER.......IT'S FREAKIN' AWESOME!!!!!!!!! I wish I could turn into a furry..... Edit: Read the forth one......SO MUCH FUN! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Shaper Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 I wish I could turn into a furry..... Do you mean an anthro? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts