Milkyway64 Posted August 20, 2011 Share Posted August 20, 2011 So I wanted to update my tier list when I noticed that doing so would be a pain. So I'm just starting anew! This is the Team Fortress 2 tier list Ver.2. Things will be a little different this time around. Like before, weapons will be sorted by class and loadout slot, and at the end of each class I will go over item sets. There will be a 1 through ten rating for their final grade, a paragraph covering strengths and weaknesses, and there will also be a new Synergy rating detailing which other weapons that particular one pairs well with and which to avoid. Further will be a 1 through 10 Manliness rating. Do bear in mind that 5 is middle ground here, not 7 or 8. Finally, for ease of reading, each weapon's stuff will be enclosed in their own ease-of-reading quote box. I'll break this up into ten posts, one for each class and a tenth for sets. Also, someone lock the last topic, if it's not too much trouble. Finally, this list assume you know how to play the game. If their is demand for how to use things or classes effectively, I might do that sometime too. Scout Primary Scattergun Grade: 8 Manliness: 5 Description: Scattergun is Scout's default primary. It is very useful, functioning as a powered up short range shotgun. Its damage is nothing to scoff at, and it is one of the better offensive weapons in the game. Synergy: Scattergun pairs well with almost anything, but of particular note is the default pistol, as it can pick off wounded targets out of the scattergun's effective range. Manalysis: Scouts are by default not very manly, but it's a sawn off shotgun. The sum of the two earns a medium manliness rating. Force-a-Nature Grade: 5 Manliness: 8 Description: Force-a-Nature (FaN) is an unlockable primary that boasts better power and the ability to blow an enemy away. It'll also let you perform a FaN jump, which will increase the already agile scout's mobility by a marginal amount. This is of course it's greatest feature and taking full advantage of it is, while tricky, very rewarding. Synergy: Unfortunately it's not as good all around as the default scattergun, so there are some things to look out for. First off, both drinks and the milk are out of the question. FaN only has two shots per clip, so a side arm is mandatory. Manalysis: Mastering the FaN jump and dancing all around your enemies is a feat worthy of respect. Haters will hate as you exercise your dominance of the terrain and pick off their baffled doctors. Shortstop Grade: 7 Manliness: 4 Description: The Shortstop is easiest explained as a hybrid between FaN and Scattergun. No crazy jumps or knockback, but fast reloads and a comfortable 4 shot clip. It performs best at midrange as opposed to Scout's normal close range and excels at burst damage. It's almost as good as the Scattergun in all rounding, except for one feature... Synergy: It uses pistol rounds. Using pistol or winger with Shortstop is an incredibly dumb move, which means to have NO long range presence at all. Thus, you should use any of the other 3 secondaries, but Mad Milk and Criticola seem to watch best, as their benefits are easier to reap with the shortstop. Manalysis: Look at you, running around with your tiny pepper gun ducking in and out of sight like some sort of mouse. Go get a real gun, and maybe everyone will stop laughing at you. Soda Popper Grade: 8 Manliness: 6 Description: The Soda Popper came from the recent Uber update. Like the shortstop, it is also easiest described as a hybrid between FaN and scattergun- just in different ways this time. The soda popper, at base, is a FaN will all it's unique abilities stripped away. No FaN jumping, no knockbacks, but it still has it's 2 shot fast reload clip, only now it's even faster. This makes it a lot like a lower powered scattergun with higher burst damage and more consistent firing over the long run, with the addition of "hype" minicrits thrown in for good measure. Hype crits activate after running around for so long while the weapon is out, and of course the scout is at his most deadly during this time. It's a solid if a bit complex weapon and stands up to the scattergun very nicely. Synergy: Like all the shotgun primaries, pistols for picking off wounded targets is great, even more so with hype-boosted pistols easily doubling their long range power. As for the "avoid" list, Criticola is 100% pointless when used with the soda popper. Additionally, Soda Popper is the only primary to matter your melee choice. Minicrit bat is nice and gives it a serious boost, so Atomizer and boston basher won't be helping you any in your hype-rage although their utilities can still be useful. Manalysis: You're kicking ass with a broken shotgun powered by radioactive soft drinks. Not the most raw act of manliness around, but it's somethin'. Tier: Soda Popper Scattergun Shortstop FaN Soda Popper and Scattergun are both incredible, but I think the edge goes to Soda Popper for Hype reasons. Secondary Pistol Grade: 7 Manliness: 3 Description: Pistol is the default secondary for scout. It is a very, very handy tool for picking off targets at mid to long range that your primary won't scratch. Also does decent close range damage and the fast reload means you can get a lot of pressure going. Synergy: The pistol is an excellent choice for all loadouts not containing Shortstop, as both weapons use the same ammo pool. Manalysis: The pistol is tiny, and it's a weird European pistol. How is this thing supposed to intimidate anyone? It doesn't even sound threatening. Bonk Energy Drink Grade: 6 Manliness: 9 Description: Bonk is an unlockable secondary for Scout, and isn't a weapon at all. Rather, it is a tool. Take a sip, become invincible. While you may not attack during this time, nothing may attack you. This is great for getting through choke points and around sentry guns, not to mention disabling sentry guns. Sentries target the nearest player, so if you run toward it (don't jump!) you will hold its attention and it will uselessly fire on you while a teamate leisurly takes it out. Synergy: Works for all weapons, but it isn't really the weapon choice you should compare, but the situation. Bonk pairs well with everything, but that doesn't mean it will be a help. Sometimes you need something else, so consider the situation before pulling out Bonk. Manalysis: Ever heard of Power Thirst? Well this is much the same way! One drink and you will run ABNORMALLY FAST. So fast, that physics will say "slooooow doooowwn!" while you "dodge" an arrow that is clearly in your face. Up your's, science! We've got pure testosterone! Crit-a-cola Grade: 3 Manliness: 7 Description: Crit-A-Cola is supposed to be a high-risk, high-reward tool for the ambush Scout. It makes the next six seconds of shots minicrits, but watch out, you also take minicrits. Not much to it other than determining when to drink it, as you have so little time to take advantage of it and drinking it too close will only get you killed. Synergy: Crit-a-cola only stands out with Shortstop, as it can feasibly fire off the most rounds over the duration and it'll also make long range semi-effective, and the longer range means an easier time dodging. Avoid with Soda popper and FaN, although minicrit FaN IS deadly, you'll generally not live long and will have no means of defending yourself from stragglers. Manalysis: Crit-a-cola makes you a war machine. When you drink a can of it, everyone KNOWS some serious crap is gonna go down. However, it was docked a few points for also making you into a pansy. Real men don't care about pain in their war machine mode. Mad Milk Grade: 5 Manliness: 2 Description: Mad Milk is another tool for Scout, this time with support focus. Anyone in range of the thrown bottle will be covered in milk, crippling spies and healing team mates who shoot the effected enemies. Synergy: Mad Milk seems to work well with everything except FaN, as it's a support item centered around helping your team and yourself live longer. Manalysis: Milk builds strong bones which is an important aspect of any man, but throwing milk is not. You look like a stupid whiny elementary schooler having a fit that his lunch money was stolen. What next, you gonna cry? Winger Grade: 2 Manliness: 2 Description: The Winger is a modified pistol with higher power but lower clip size. However, the "higher power" means "Unnoticable difference" and "lower clip size" means "5." This thing is pretty garbage, as the default outperforms it in damage over time, damage per clip, reliabilty, and manliness. Synergy: Don't use with Shortstop. Or anything else for that matter, except MAYBE soda popper. Hype crits MIGHT be enough to make it all seem worth it, as mini crit winger shots sting something fierce, but really there's not much practical use for it. Manalysis: Take a look at Pistol's manliness analysis. Experts say that making it look like a toy does not fix those flaws. Lugermorph Manliness: 4 Manalysis: So you got yourself a cartoon pistol, huh? Still not very manly, even if Max sorta is. Maybe. Tier: Pistol Bonk Milk Cola Winger Pistol is king for being so useful, but from there it depends on what sort of scout you are and the situation. Bonk can change games, and sometimes providing a health boost for the team can trump shooting at a fleeing medic. Winger is still pretty bad no matter what, though. Melee Bat Grade: 3 Manliness: 3 Description: Stock Melee for Scout. Pretty bad even by melee standards, and since your primary outperforms it and then some at close range, there's rarely a reason to whip out the bat unless you are desperate. Synergy: Goes well with everything. Or rather, is equally made pointless by all other primaries with one exception. If you use any of the drinks or Milk + FaN it may see a bit of use, but face it, you'll have died by the time you do any real damage. Hype crit bat may be just effective enough to work though, if you are feeling ballsy. Manalysis: Only punks jump people with a bat, and you're a scout, so you fit the profile perfectly. Come back when you're not such an embarrassment to the rest of us mercenaries. Sandman Grade: 7 Manliness: 2 Description: The sandman is an unlockable, and is the first in a trend that will peg Scout melee weapons as utilities rather than true weapons. The sandman adds a baseball projectile to stun foes for an easy kill at the cost of 15 HP from your max health. Seems small, but newsflash; kind of a big deal especially with explosions. Synergy: Sandman works well with EVERYTHING. The stun can mean a free kill on even a heavy, and most secondaries can even benefit, especially crit-a-cola if you're cool with only having 2 seconds to shhot them post-stun. Manalysis: So you got yourself a wooden bat, huh, and now you're trying to hit us with a baseball too? My, you're childish. There is also nothing lower than disabling your opponent at war before shooting him dead, so hitting that thing out means you're not one ball short, but three. Holy Mackeral Grade: 3 Manliness: 7 Description: The Holy Mackeral is almost identical to the bat, only the kill feed announces every hit you make with the weapon. Arguably, this means it is harder to keep a low profile. Synergy: Works with all. See bat. Manalysis: How is a fish manly? It isn't really, it's unconventional and silly, but that's not where the score comes from. It comes from the user, who has something to prove. By taking this wet, weak fish in your hands, you know that someone will be made your bitch and everyone WILL know. It is this aura of confidence that seperates men from cocky kids, son, and for that you've made a big step forward. Candy Cane Grade: 6 Manliness: 4 Description: The Candy Cane is another utility, making enemies drop small health packs for you on death no matter what weapon finishes them. The downside is explosions will hurt more, which is bad news. Both abilities are passive, so as an active weapon the cane is identical to the bat. The health pack drops are a wonderful boon especially against pyros, but watch out, enemies can use them too. Synergy: As the effects are passive, it more relies on situation rather than loadout when deciding to use candy cane. FaN users may enjoy it the most, as their increased mobility makes dodging easier. Shortstop users may also benefit as their mid-range sweetspot also means easier explosive dodging as well as less damage overall thanks to falloff. Manliness: A candy cane still isn't manly, unless you're actively bashing in heads with it. Such a delicious irony, their mothers always told them candy was bad for their teeth, and they scoffed. Who's laughing now, after you've finally prven her right? Boston Basher Grade: 5 Manlyness: 5 Description: The boston basher adds bleed effect to your bat but makes it so, if you miss, you hit yourself. That alone makes it godawful, but as a utility it is different. Boston basher is a nice uber building tool and swinging in midair while crouched can give you a huge boost in jump distance at the cost of some health. Synergy: Use with anything but FaN, as your mobility needs are covered by it. Manalysis: A spiked club is better than a bat, but that's not all, you're a cocky son of a bitch, too. So you think you have perfect aim? Do you just don't care about your well being as long as it means the enemy suffers? All of these are nice man traits, but stop your screaming, you pansy. It's just a scratch. Sun-On-A-Stick Grade: 4 Manliness: 7 Description: Sun on a stick trades off some damage for guaranteed crits on burning targets. Buddy up with a pyro and you may see some use in this. Synergy: No downsides (practically) and a clear upside when fire is involved. Naturally, this compliments any setup as long as you have pyros, so it's team synergy here, not loadout synergy. Manalysis: Ever been so furious that you wanted to mirror the sun's intensity? Now you can, as the sun is now with you! That deserves some respect, and for god's sake it doesn't look like a toy. However, to fully realize yourself, you need some help, which while isn't too big a hit on the manly score, you are expected to do things yourself, hippie. Fan-O-War Grade: 4 Manliness: 8 Description: The fan-o-war is easily compared to as melee-jarate, as it hits for peanuts but ensures minicrits on whoever you tagged. This is another support weapon for Scout, as it benefits the team more than it does you. Synergy: It really doesn't work all that well, though. To take advantage yourself, you must first switch weapons and by then, it may be too late. FaN users may like it as their play style is hit and run, but beyond that it won't do a ton for you. Manalysis: Hitting people with fans is silly, but you're marking them for death. The Reaper himself obeys you! You know you have some serious man-points when Death himself is an ally. Atomizer Grade: 7 Manlyness: 3 Description: The atomizer sacrifices swing speed for a tripple jump. As gone over many times, as a utility, this makes it awesome. You can be even more unpredictable and can reach higher and farther ledges at the cost of 10 health per tripple jump. Synergy: FaN users should avoid, as should Soda Poppers to a lesser degree. Other than that, it is a very nice addition to anything. Manalysis: Nice. A toy-bat looking thing. If the laws of physics pay even LESS attention to you, why should any of your enemies? Three Rune Blade Manliness: 6 Manalysis: Swords are manly, but only if you know how to use them, dipshit. Props for trying, though, maybe someday you won't be a joke. Tiers: Atomizer Sandman Candy Cane Boston Basher Sun on a stick Fan-o-war Bat Holy Makeral Atomizer and Sandman offer the greatest utilities for the lowest costs, while the middle tiered weapons are personal preference and situational options. The bat and Mackeral lose out for having no utility at other than their pitiful damage, with the bat being slightly ahead for reasons relating to not letting the entire enemy team know you are out of ammo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vy'drach Posted August 20, 2011 Share Posted August 20, 2011 Personally think Shortstop should have a higher manliness rating. It's a modified COP 357 Derringer, which was quite heavy and had quite the trigger pull that only real men could handle, and fired the dreaded .357 magnum round, but that wasn't good enough for Scoots there, he had to jury rig it to be the epitome of sawed-off shotguns, but he bent the laws of physics and didn't give it the disadvantages that sawed-off shotguns get, lack of range and accuracy. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/COP_357_Derringer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted August 20, 2011 Author Share Posted August 20, 2011 Soldier Primary Rocket Launcher Grade: 9 Manliness: 9 Description: The rocket launcher is the bread and butter of Soldier, and a candidate for best weapon in the game. It shoots rockets, they explode, things die. That's how it goes. Also be aware of the rocket jump, doen by firing a rocket under you mid crouch-jump. Different angles can be achieved depending on where you shoot the rocket, but all of them are a huge boost to mobilty. Rockets as a whole are best shot from the high ground, as the splash damage is what gets most of your kills rather than direct hits. Thus, it is more productive to hit the terrain near the enemy. Synergy: Works well with everything except maybe Battalion's Backup. Manalysis: A rocket launcher is serious business. Serious business for a serious man. Explosions are some of the coolest things around, and your weapon not only makes lots of them, but harnesses their power into ride-able steed of amazingness. Direct Hit Grade: 6 Manlyness: 6 Description: The direct hit is a more powerful rocket launcher variant with more speed and damage, but little to no splash damage. It's really pretty bad, but it can shine against engineers. Do NOT think that the higher power gives you an edge against other soldiers; it really doesn't. The Direct hit is also a powerful Spy and Scout deterent, as a close range direct rocket will likely kill them (and always if either have an HP reducing weapon.) Synergy: The direct hit doesn't really synergize well with other weapons. The back pack secondaries need damage to fill, which is easier done with splash rockets. The reserve shooter doesn't have enough ammo to make up for missed shots either, so that leaves shotgun and righteous bison, which direct hit doesn't compliment much. Manalysis: As the explosions get smaller, so does your man rating, Soldier. Besides that, your rockets fly too fast; your enemies won't know the fear of their imminent doom coming in steadily. Black Box Grade: 7 Manliness: 3 Description: Black Box sacrifices a fourth of your clip size for healing rockets, with restore 15 HP for every hit on an enemy. The lack of a fourth rocket puts you at a big disadvantage in most situations, especially against other soldiers, but the health regen suits the roaming soldier who does not rely on a medic. Synergy: As a defensive rocket launcher, it only goes without saying that the defensive Battalian's Backup suits it. However, that means your three rockets is all you got. Unless you are defending, the backpacks should be avoided. A medic will make charging the backup easier than the Blackbox would, and sooner or later you will be caught defenseless. Manalysis: Choosing the Black Box says one thing about you above all else; four explosions was too much for your green ass to handle. It also says something else, that being that you are a coward who has to take health from others to stand a chance. Liberty Launcher Grade: 5 Manliness:6 Description: Liberty launcher, like black box, uses the lack of a rocket in your clip to justify a boost in another area. This time it's speed. Like the velocity of Direct Hit rockets but lament the loss of splash damage? Here you go, this is for you, even if it isn't that great. It works, but the extra speed doesn't justify the tradeoff, and you'll really see that against other soldiers. However, Scouts will be less of an issue, as they will have a harder time dodging. Synergy: This is probably a decent weapon to use with the backpacks, as the speed and splash mean you can more reliably build rage. However, the same problem with the black box applies; without a side arm you don't have much to fight with. Manalysis: Again, you want less explosions? Shame on you! However, the rocket launcher is clearly AMERICAN, so I guess you get off easy. Cow Mangler 5000 Grade: 8 Manliness: 8 Description: The Cow Mangler 5K reverses the trend and ADDS a rocket to your clip for the cost of damage. It also has the perks of infinite ammo and a nifty secondary fire. There's also a second downside; no crits. Ever. Even medic-assisted or humiliation. This means that Kritzkreig medics will be useless on you, and you won't get that random crocket satisfaction on anyone else. The alt fire expends all 5 shots for a super blast that does heavy damage and ignites the enemy, likely killing light classes in a single shot. Synergy: This was made for the backpacks. 5 shots means the shotguns and bison aren't necessary to stay in the fight, so feel proud about your support items. Manalysis: Lasers, while not -quite- as manly as explosions, are still pretty high up there. Besides that, look at the end of your cannon sizzle and crackle with lightning! It's like Nikola Tesla himself reincarnated into a murder machine that hates EVERYTHING! Also fire. Can't forget fire. And charge beam! Megaman has a chargebeam, and Megaman is one of the most manly series ever next to Contra. Rocket Jumper Grade: 1 Manliness: 1 Description: A tool for practicing rocket jumps. Effectively halves your HP. Synergy: With Market Gardener... Maybe. I guess? Manalysis: How could you stoop this low, you disgusting maggot? Get your fireworks out of here and get a REAL rocket! Your pitiful, harmless, showboat smoke and mirrors imitation disgusts ME, and it disgusts us all! The Original Grade: 9 Manliness: 9 Description: A rocket launcher reskin, with one minor difference. Rockets travel perfectly straight rather than slightly from the right. While this means you don't have a "dominant" side, it means sentries will be harder to corner. Synergy: See rocket launcher Manliness: see rocket launcher Tiers: Rocket Launcher Cow Mangler 5K Black Box Direct Hit Liberty Launcher Not counting the rocket jumper and original, this looks about right. Rocket Launcher is the reigning king as it has the most versatility and raw offensive prowess, while cow mangler sits just behind for the more supportive soldier. Com Mangler simply just doesn't perform well in a Soldier vs. Soldier scenario with the other one wielding rocket launcher. Black box and direct hit are situational and potentially crippling, taking away a big chunk of Soldier's threat. Liberty launcher is bottom with little surprise as it also has the same problem as the above 2, but having no true upside other than chasing spies and scouts. SECONDARY Shotgun Grade: 8 Manliness: 6 Description: Standard shotty, which multiple classes can use. It is versatile, powerful, and reliable. For the Soldier, it functions best as a finisher and side arm, when reloading the rocket launcher isn't an option. Try to shoot targets airbourne from a rocket, as they won't be able to dodge. Synergy: A must if you use direct hit or any of the 3 ammo launchers. A desirable companion to standard rocket launcher, and sort of redundant, but still helpful, on Cow Mangler. Manalysis: Shotguns are cool. A shotgun that sees lots of use is the sign of a skilled Soldier and thus, respect. Buff Banner Grade: 5 Manlyness: 7 Description: it is a banner worn on the back, and it buffs team mates. To do so, you must acquire Rage, which comes from damaging enemies. Then you blow the trumpet of WAR and kick everyone's ass. Synergy: Works GREAT with the mangler, and bad with the 3 ammo launchers/direct hit. The loss of a sidearm is too crippling for them. Manalysis: Being manly is the building blocks of a warrior, and your influence turns your brigade from a cowering sack of girls into full fledged enforcers of the law! You LEAD these maggots, which is + tons of respect and man points. Gunboats Grade: 3 Manliness: 2 Description: Boots that reduce self-caused explosion damages, leading to lots of rocket jumps. That's about it, though. They have almost no use except for suicide bombing medics. Synergy: None, really. Just avoid 3 ammo launchers. Manalysis: Look at you and your little girl trainingwheels. Oh, I'm so scared! Get serious, soldier, this is WAR, not the circus! Battalion's Backup Grade: 4 Manlyness: 4 Description: The inverse of buff banner, deploying it makes your team mates more hardy and immune to crits, and rage is built by TAKING damage. This means it is much harder to put to use, and the effects are less pronounced than Buff Banner. It can nueter a Kritz medic's uber charge, but only with some prediction as it takes a moment for it to come out. Synergy: As gone into above, avoid 3 ammo launchers, and use with Mangler or standard rocket launcher. Manalysis: It's not that it is inherently unmanly, it just lacks... punch, I guess. It's underwhelming and you have to get slapped around by the inferior side to even use it. Concherer Grade: 5 Manliness: 2 Description: A fusion of buff banner and battalion's backup, it builds rage in both ways and the effect itself can lend to a defensive boost and offensive push equally as well. While active, you and your team mates will leech health from enemies. The two specialized banners do each job better, but this is not to be overlooked. Synergy: Same as always. Cow mangler good, 3 ammo launchers/direct hit bad. Manalysis: Only a coward steals health like a vampire! You know who else was a vampire?! Edward Cullen! Do you want to be like that, much less force everyone else to?! Mantreads Grade: 1 Manliness: 7 Description: Boots that reduce knockback and alloww you to goomba stomp enemies for 3x your fall damage. Synergy: Rocket jumper? Manalysis: Although your choice is terrible, your spirit is in the right place, son. Mario may be silly, but he wins all the time because snapping necks gets RESULTS. And anyone who wants to stand up to you? You don't even care! You'll stand there and -refuse- to budge despite the breath leaving your bullet riddled body! Reserve Shooter Grade: 7 Manliness: 9 Description: A shotgun varient that halves clipsize for faster weapon switching and minicrits on airbourne targets. Like normal shotgun, you ESPECIALLY want to use this as a finisher on foes you've popped up. The faster switch also gives you an initial advantage in prolonged fights. Synergy: Just about anything, but beware 3 ammo launchers, as between the two of these you only get six shots. Manalysis: This thing's almost got it all. It sounds like a goddamn cannon, and the mere act of holding it oozes a confidence that you know you can so thoroughly control and wreck the opposition- throwing them up like a plaything and finishing them with an embarrasing super powered blast of superiority. Son, I am proud of you. Righteous Bison Grade: 4 Manliness: 6 Description: A Soldier secondary to break the mold, it is an offensive weapon that isn't a shotgun. Boasting infinite ammo and piercing properties, it is interesting to play with, but ultimately not that good. It'll punish retreating enemies but do little against advancing or stationary ones. Synergy: Nothing really. Pretty self contained. Manalysis: More lasers, but this one is a little weak pistol. I guess it still works, but it lacks presence. Tiers: Shotgun Reserve Shooter Buff Banner Concherer Righteous Bison Battalian's Backup Gunboats Mantreads Shotgun and reserve shhoter win out on the fact that they compliment all of Soldier's primaries, with the Buff Banner and Concherer following for support Soldiers. The boots, bison, and backup just don't pull their weight, though, especially the boots, so they really have no business on any soldier except maybe very, very situationally. MELEE Shovel Grade: 3 Manliness: 7 Description: Stock, average melee weapon. Synergy: Nothing. Manalysis: The shovel is a handy tool, shame not so much in TF2. However, that only boosts its manpoints. There is no reason to pull out out other than to make a personal statement on your enemies. "Look at me!" you say. "I have a trench spade, and I'm gonna use it to bury your DIGNITY." Equalizer Grade: 9 Manliness: 5 Description: Soldier unloackable that increases speed and damage as you get weaker, but only while holding. This means it is perfect for last stands and escapes, and that it is one of the best tools available to any class. All of this, for the downside of not being healed by medics. Synergy: Only EVERYTHING. Manalysis: Much like logic paradoxes fry AI's, our experts went into comas when faced with this one. It gets a nuetral score based on its ability to enter both extremes of the spectrum. Coawards will run away, the spineless welps, while the man will use it to smack his troubles with unrivaled fury. Pain Train Grade: 6 Manliness: 4 Description: A weapon that passively increases point capping speed/cart pushing speed while making you more vulnerable to bullets. Beware! Synergy: Gunboats make it possible to quick-cap points if the enemy tame isn't paying attention. Otherwise, it depends on situation. Manalysis: Suck it up, Barbara. Getting shot isn't THAT bad. Half-Zatoichi Grade: 6 Manliness: 9 Description: A melee weapon that full heals on a kill, but once drawn, may never be put away until you achieve the kill. Soldier's slow speed may make it seem useless, but try using it as a finisher ala Reserve Shooter. Synergy: Nothing much, though avoid Black Box. that's just redundant. Manalysis: Here we go! A cool sword that only the honorable can use! And a duel system? Awesome! Disciplinary Action Grade: 7 Manliness: 5 Description: A melee that does less damage but gives team mates speed boosts. Useful for getting to the front lines! Synergy: Nothing much. Most Soldier melees are self contained. Manalysis: Taking control of the team is manly, but it's a whip. The only people to ever make whips cools are belmonts and Indiana Jones, and your whip isn't even the same. Market Gardener Grade: 2 Manliness: 10 Description: A shovel with no crits except during rocket jumps, then it always crits. Synergy: Rocket jumper or gunboats would suit this nicely, but it's unweildy. It is very hard to land hits and even if you could, the resulting damage isn't THAT good. Manalysis: The first on our list to receive a perfect score, the Market Gardener is a real man's first. Paired with the reserve shooter, you will be one badass beast, roaming the battlefield, destorying the enemy with your sheer charisma and humilating kills showcasing your mastery of the air and the very maggots you are dominating. ...Of course, you have to actually be good at this for full manliness effect, but even a failure in training is a sight to behold, too. Frying Pan Manliness: 3 Manalysis: Now you just look silly, Soldier. What good's that thing gonna do you? Tier: Equalizer Disciplinary Action Pain Train Half Zatoichi Shovel Market Gardener Equalizer is clear winner, even second place can hardly compare. Pain train over Zatoichi for it's situation game-changing ability, and while market gardener is technically a straight upgrade to shovel, random crits are more practical and reliable than jump-crits sadly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted August 20, 2011 Author Share Posted August 20, 2011 PYRO Primary Flamethrower Grade: 4 Manliness: 6 Description: Pyro's basic, and sadly his worst. Flamethrower does weak, but rapid close range damage with afterburn, which ticks away 3 HP evey half second or so. Also has the airblast, an EXTREMELY useful support option for 20 ammo cost. Synergy: Being a flame thrower, it works well with flare gun. As of right now its only use is on defense, so it also compliments home wrecker as well for maximum Spy counter. Manalysis: It's a gun that shoots FLAMES! That's cool. Quite. Back Burner Grade: 6 Manliness: 8 Description: A flame thrower that adds power and guaranteed crits for fewer air blasts. The choice of an up-close-and-personal pyro. Synergy: Doesn't really go with anything, but avoid using with Axtinguisher. It's redundant. Manalysis: Face to face combat is manly. Dragon heads added to the end of your flamethrower is also manly. Degreaser Grade: 8 Manliness: 4 Description: The best flamethrower overall, the degreaser sacrifices 1 point of afterburn damage for VERY quick weapon switch. While this means it is physically weakest, it also means best synergy with other weapons. Synergy: Shotgun, Flaregun, and ESPECIALLY axtinguisher. Manalysis: It sounds weird, and looks like a combination of everything but the kitchen sink. MacGuyvering is a manly practice, but this thing just looks embarrasing. Tiers: Degreaser Backburner Flamethrower Degreaser is best for its utility. It retains full air blasts, and pair with axtinguisher it has the might of backburner. Backburner is a power option, and quite viable. Flame thrower unfortunately is a defense oriented thing, only suited for Pyros with no intentions to move far. SECONDARY Shotgun Grade: 7 Manliness: 6 Description: Good ol' shotty. Perfect for other pyros, mid range enemies, and fleeing enemies. Synergy: GREAT with Degreaser, good with others. Manalysis: It's the same manly shotgun, but with all this fire flying around, it's underwhelming. Flare Gun Grade: 6 Manliness: 3 Description: The flaregun trades away the usefulness of the shotty for a very potent long range weapon. The flare gun does weak damaage and ignites targets that you hit, and if you hit them again or the target was already burning, it crits. Very nice. Synergy: Pairs well with Degreaser for sweet air shots. Manalysis: Boring. Looks like a toy, underwelming... Get your fireworks out of here. Detonator Grade: 4 Manliness: 4 Description: Flaregun that no longer crits burning players, but minicrits. The upside is it explodes now, so area of effect burns are possible. Synergy: Pretty bad overall, but the defense pyro running Flame thrower may like it. Manliness: It's a flaregun but with an explosion, so +1 point. Tiers: Shotgun Flaregun Detonator Utility over burst power over situational. This can't really be argued. MELEE Fire Axe Grade: 2 Manlyness: 7 Description: Stock melee. Useless as Pyro's primary does its job and better. Synergy: Nothing. Manalysis: In much the same way the Shovel was, half of the manliness factor comes from there being no reason to use it other than manly purposes. Plus, it's got irony, and good pun potential. Axtinguisher Grade: 9 Manliness: 9 Description: lower damge and no random crits. Big loss, I'm sure we all miss that from the Fire Axe. Again, Like Scout Pyro's melees are utility, not weapons in most cases Axtinguisher is both, it crits burning targets, which assuming no medic interference that's 8 out of 9 classes you can one shot. The "puff n sting" is a very, very powerful ambush attack on par with the backstab, and makes the Pyro the threat he can be. Synergy: Degreaser, all the way. Avoid with backburner. Manalysis: The Axtinguisher is a pinnacle of testosterone soaked weaponry. It's got it all, it's an axe, it's got barbed wire, it's terrifying, and it involves the person getting cleaved to be -on fire.- Talk about RAD. Homewrecker Grade: 4 Manliness: 8 Description: Homewrecker is an anit-spy weapon. It will remove sappers off friendly buildings. This of course suits it for defense Pyro, but don't expect much from offense mindsets with Homewrecker. Synergy: Flamethrower and detonator along with homewrecker is the ultimate engie buddy. While all four by themselves are bad, as a set you have a strong force holding the point; with some help that is. Manalysis: It's a goddamn sledgehammer. Come on now! PowerJack Grade: 6 Manliness: 7 Description: A powerful melee that leeches health. Can be used in puff-n-sting combos for less effect but higher payoff. Synergy: Degreaser for obvious reasons, Backburner for utility Manalysis: An electical transformer on a stick? For a weapon? Pyro's melees are so rad, that high scores feel like the norm. Backscratcher Grade: 6 Manliness: 5 Description: A counterpart to the backscratcher, it also does high damage and effects health somehow. This time, healthpacks will be more effective, while medics and dispensers will heal less. Synergy: Backburner. Very much so. Manalysis: It's a rake, which isn't all that manly. Or maybe we've been spoiled by the other options in this lineup. Sharpened Volcano Fragment Grade: 1 Manlyness: 9 Description: A volcanic axe that does reduced damge and inflicts and enxtended afterburn. Completely useless in normal play. Synergy: Mideval mode Manalysis: Look at it. Look at it. There you go, that's what we thought too. Maul Manliness: 6 Manalysis: The maul looks cool, but it isn't as classic as a sledge hammer, we think. Postal Pummeler Manliness: 7 Manalysis: While the Axtinguisher out-mans the postal pummeler, there's a tradeoff. Postal pummeler has insane pun potential, and the novelty of using a mailbox to cave skulls in is nice, too. Tiers: Axtingusher Backscratcher Powerjack Howewrecker Fire Axe Volcano fragment Axtinguisher is amazing, but not for backburners. They get the inerior but useful backscratcher. The homewrecker and powerjack fall in situational territory while the bottom 2 are garbage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted August 20, 2011 Author Share Posted August 20, 2011 DEMOMAN PRIMARY Sticky Launcher Grade: 10 Manliness: 3 Description: Those of you familiar with competitive play know that Demoman is limited to one per team. This is why. It's a great defenive weapon and a greater offensive weapon with a huge clip, high damage, and little flaws. Synergy: Loch N Load, perhaps. Eyelender and shield (more on that later) Manalysis: Sticky launcher, while effective, also makes you look like a lttle bitch. It oozes cheapness and cowardice, but on the flip side, it can be used for some really manly tricks. Ever heard of the Amazing Flying Demoman? Scottish Resistance Grade: 6 Manliness: 8 Description: A more defense oriented sticky launcher that can lay more bombs at a time and remotely detonate them. The downside is you have to wait a while before they explode, all but neutering its offensive capability. Synergy: It helps to have the grenade launcher with this thing, as loch n load isn't reliable and the sticky bombs themselves are terrible at facing direct threats. Manalysis: Just as this thing took a major hit in effectiveness, it's man score shot up appropriately. Experts have dubbed the Scottish Resistance the real man's sticky launcher, as opposed to that dumbed down, easy to handle wimp magnet shown above. This is because of many reasons, but the top few are more explosions = cooler, more skill is needed to put it to its great if specialized potential, and every manly stunt that can be performed with a sticky launcher can also be done with this. On top of all that, it is the epitome of the demo doing his job, he isn't classified as "defense" for nothin'. Sticky Jumper Grade: 4 Manliness: 10 Description: A sticky jump practice tool that is harmless to yourself and others, and effectively halves your HP. However, it shows some use when paired with certain weapons. Synergy: Ullapool caber + grenade launcher makes the demoman into a fearsome suicide bomber from Hell. ESPECIALLY in Arena, where that first kill means your grenade launcher fires crits. Manalysis: Where the other two launchers have potential manliness, the Jumper encourages it. It transforms the Flying Demoman from a parlor trick to a full blown playstyle made of terror and awesome. Chargin' Targe Grade: 5 Manliness: 6 Description: Some may notice that these weapons are out of order. That's because equipping the targe or any shield item essentially makes you a brand new class called Demoknight. The demoknight is a Melee specialist who uses his shield to run over long distances at great speed for a lethal strike. The targe is the defensive model of demoknight, as his shield grants passive damage resistance to a explosive and fire sources. Synergy: Grenade launcher, ali baba's wee booties, and most melee weapons. Manalysis: It comes as no surprise that charging a gun-toting enemy with a blade or bottle of booze is manly, but not quite as manly as it could be. Splendid Screen Grade: 7 Manliness: 7 Description: This alternate shield suits the offensive demoknight better, trading off some of the damage resistance for more raw power. Synergy: Most of the melee weapons, Ali Baba's Wee Booties. Manalysis: See above, this is melee-charging manliness at its best. Tiers: Sticky Launcher Splendid Screen Scottish resistance Chargin' Targe Sticky jumper Sticky launcher, as one of the best weapons in the game, means that Demoman is best played as a demoman. However, Splendid Screen makes the subclass, demo knight, quite a threat combined with some other items. The two defense oriented versions of the weapons are good, but don't hold up, and the jumper is bottom for obvious reasons. SECONDARY Grenade Launcher Grade: 8 Manliness: 2 Description: The Grenade launcher is a reliable weapon that does well in both defense and offense. It packs a punch, and direct hits will fend off foes really well, and any shot that misses will linger and roll to explode later, meaning that spamming at chokepoints can be as good area denial as even the stickybomb launcher. Synergy: A good side arm for almost anything, even shields if you don't mind sacrificing the Booties. Manalysis: Ever heard of "spam pills get kills?" Our experts have, and thoroughly disapprove. While every man loves a grenade launcher, this particular one has a habit of making the weilder a blithering sissy. Lock N' Load Grade: 7 Manliness: 8 Description: An alternate grenade launcher with no rollers and half clip, but higher damage. It emphasizes accurate aim to annihilate enemies. Notable for completely RUINING an Engineer's day. Synergy: Avoid with shields and scottish resistance, consider with sticky launcher. Manalysis: This is more like it. This is what the brave and manly use, as it says that the only hit you'll except is the one that hits the enemy's FACE. It commands skill, and respect from your pansy demoman peers. Ali Baba's Wee Booties Grade: 8 Manliness: 1 Description: This is a passive item that increases HP by 25 and adds mobilty to the demoknight's charge. It gets such a high rating because it can be used with most primaries to a desirable effect, not to mention that a certain trick will make it even moreso with the stickylauncher... Synergy:Shields, stickylauncher Manalysis: Look at the name. Yeah, kinda hard to take you seriously, you Scotch son of a bitch. Besides that, you look like Zig-Zag from Theif and the Cobbler. Not a good point in your favor. Tiers: Alibaba's Wee Booties Grenade Launcher Loch N' Load I think the booties, while close, beats out the grenade launcher in pure potential. The grenade launcher is still much more universally useful, but for reasons to soon be made clear, the booties can make a sticky demoman immortal. Even without it, 200Hp on a sticky demo is nothing to scoff at, and demoknights realize their full potential with the booties as well. Melee Bottle Grade: 3 Manliness: 8 Description: Stock Melee. Best used when you want no negative effects on you. Synergy: Scottish resistance, mostly. Manalysis: Booze is manly. Using your bottle as a weapon is equally so. Bring the barfight and PAIN to the battlefield, you drunkard, and let them know what real conflict is. Eyelander Grade: 8 Manliness: 9 Description: The first of the melees made for the demoknight, the eyelander starts you off with a penalty of 25 health and adds more and more as you collect heads, which are gained from slaying enemies with they eyelander. It stops going up after 4 heads. It also increases your speed as you collect heads. Synergy: Shields, booties, sticky launcher. Elaborating on that last one, you can switch primaries and retain your headcount. So you can wear booties, eyelander, and a shield, get four heads, then switch yo sticky launcher in spawn and be a fast, bulky sticky luanching death machine that only gets worse with a medic on you. Manalysis: It takes the heads of your enemies to power yourself up. Awesome, awesome, but we at the labs were more impressed by the trick noted above in Synergy. Short of being ubered, that's the most invincible you can get. Very little could stop a man like that, and it's all thanks to the Eyelander. It gets our approval. Scottsman's Skullcutter Grade: 5 Manliness: 7 Description: The scottsman's skullcutter slows the demo down slightly in exchange for higher melee damage. Synergy: Shields. The only way you can reliably hit someone with it is through a charge, and the crit from doing so is devastating. Manalysis: As a battle axe, it scores high. Any questions, Maggot? Pain Train Grade: 4 Manliness: 4 Description: As on Soldier, it caps points and carts faster. While the vulnerability to bullets is bad, with a shield or sticky jump you could potentially ninja-cap a point and change the game. Synergy: Shields, sticky jumper Manalysis: It still isn't that manly, and holding it with your shield just looks silly, son. Ullapool Caber Grade: 8 Manliness: 8 Description: Insanely powerful melee attack. Only works once and hits yourself too. As Demoman melees are usually rare (note: DemoMAN, not DemoKNIGHT) this makes it the top choice for sticky demos. Synergy: Sticky launcher, scottish resistance, sticky jumper. Avoid with shields unless you are messing around. Manalysis: Don't get us wrong, using a live grenade to hit someone in the face with takes some serious balls, but on its own it just sort of comes off as the coward's way out. The Caber's true man potential comes from charging with it and Flying Demoman antics. Claidheahm Mor Grade: 3 Manliness: 5 Description: At the cost of 15 health, you get a slightly extended charge with shields. Not that great, really, and absolutely useless on a Sticky demo. Synergy: Shields Manalysis: Experts are not sure what to make of this blade. Running farther can be used for both manly and cowardly purposes, so we went with nuetrality. Half-Zatoichi Grade: 8 Manliness: 9 Description: Same thing as Soldier, but the ability to charge makes it even more useful. If you have booties equipped, then being honorbound means absolutely nothing, so charge and cut away with this excellent demoknight weapon. Synergy: Shields, booties Manalysis: See Soldier, then add in bloodthirsty charges into battle armed with nothing but your Katana. Persian Persuader Grade: 9 Manliness: 7 Description: A weapon that converts ammo to health and allows for more frequent charges. While this naturally lends well to Demoknights, sticky demomen can also take advantage presuming an engineer is around to help them reload. Synergy: Booties, shields Manalysis: This is the ultimate in demoknighting, and thus scores high. We don't need to repeat that we at the lab are fond of close range weaponry and the sheer amount of balls it takes to throw down your gun and charge into battle, so the numbers speak for themselves. Horseless Headless Horsemann's Headtaker Manliness: 10 Manalysis: As an axe that belonged to a murderous, unstoppable ghost, the mere fact of you holding this only means that you not only showed him up, but you took on his legacy of eternal ass kicking! Frying Pan Manliness: 7 Manalysis: While dumb on Soldier, it provides an aura of seriously not giving a shit on the person of a drunkard Scottish man. Nessie's Nine Iron Manliness: 6 Manalysis: While we initially wanted to give this a low score, we gave it a second look and noticed 2 things: one, it has moderate pun potential and two, you are DECAPITATING folks with it. It's a blunt object, for Saxton's sake! Also on debate was its tendency to talk to the user, but we have yet to conclude whether or not it's haunted or if we're just too drunk. Tiers: Persian Persuader Ullapool Caber Eyelander Half-Zatoichi Scottsman's skullcutter Pain Train Bottle Claidheamh Mor The persian Persuader is an EXCELLENT survival choice no matter your preferred type of demoman, but for sticky users the Caber may be more preferable. Between Zatoichi and Eyelander, I chose Eyelander for it's higher potential and combo with sticky launcher if you are proficient in both demo night and normal demoman. From there it's just situational things, except for bottle and claidheamh mor. The latter is near useless, wwhile the former just can't stand up to the other excellent weapons at the Demo's disposal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted August 23, 2011 Author Share Posted August 23, 2011 HEAVY Primary Minigun Grade: 8 Manliness: 7 Description: Heavy's default, the minigun functions a lot like a constantly shooting shotgun. I sprays bulltets in a wide cone that are devastarting at close range, and useless at long. Pistol rounds do more damage at long range than the minigun does, so make sure you are in position before firing. As for how it stacks up to the other guns, usually in Heavy vs. Heavy Minigun wins, so the standard minigun is a good all-rounder that doesn't have to worry about being countered. Synergy: The standard minigun is powerful and revs up in only a second or so, rendering the need of a sidearm worthless. Thus, food items are the best choice, especially Sandvich. Manalysis: Miniguns are cool. What else could we add? Natascha Grade:4 Manliness: 6 Description: Natascha trades off power and speed for the unique ability to slow enemies down. It is generally pretty terrible, as the speed and power penalty are problematic by themselves, but the slow effect is barely noticeable unless at close range- where they'll die anyway with other weapons. Synergy: Nothing compliments Natascha, but the slower rev may mean a shotgun is needed. Manalysis: Being identical to the minigun, it gets a near identical score, only a point was docked for the slowdown feature. Brass Beast Grade: 6 Manliness: 9 Description: Like Natascha, Brass Beast sacrifices speed for a boost in another area. Unlike Natascha, its boost is in power. The Brass Beast makes moving while spun up near impossible, and makes the process of revving up in the first place a chore. This means that pulling it out to fight off an ambush will likely end in your death before you may even begin firing. So, you should turn the tables. The Brass Beast lends itself well to a defensive styled Heavy, one who rarely moves and guards one spot, say, a payload cart or capture point. The higher damage may make you think you can beat Minigun heavies, and you can, provided you were already spun up upon seeing them. Synergy: As Brass Beast is extremely slow to pull out and spin up, food items may not help much since you are highly likely to die if caught with your pants down. It may be batter to bring shotgun or Family Business instead, as you can resort to that if caught in such a situation. You could also try dalohkas bar for a health boost to sustain yourself as you spin up, but if there's a medic present; and their should be, there's no need for it. Manalysis: Brass Beast scores high because it makes the user into a stationary fortress of pain with a sweet looking gun. Beast users don't quite see why legs are useful for anything but running away in terror, which they themselves obviously have no need to do. Tomislav Grade: 7 Manliness: 5 Description: The Tomislav is another minigun variant for another playstyle, this time for Stealth Heavies. At the cost of some power, the Tomislav spins up quickly and makes no noise doing so, so it's perfect for waiting in ambush for unsuspecting foes to pass by. Synergy: Take a food item. The Tomislav revs up so fast that a shotgun is flat out unnecessary. Manalysis: The Tomislav is an oversized tommy gun. While this is awesome, the Heavy's way of using it looks silly. Iron Curtain Manliness: 8 Manalysis: Just slightly cooler than the normal minigun, as it looks clunky and mean. Tiers: Minigun Tomislav Brass Beast Natascha Minigun, on virtue of suiting all styles and being the number one choice versus other Heavies, is a clear winner. Tomislav trails behind in while its pros bring new, great things to the table, the cons mean that Minigun heavies will chew you up as would a good Soldier. Brass Beast is reserved for defense but does so well, unlike Natascha which isn't good for much of anything. Secondary Shotgun Grade: 3 Manliness: 6 Description: The shotgun, as always, is reliable and versatile, but not on the Heavy. Heavy's primary is similar to the shotgun in use, only better, so shotgun is reserved for loadouts that use a primary that can't be pulled out on a whim, namely Brass Beast or Natascha. Synergy: As said above, Brass Beast and Natascha are the only two primaries shotgun should be paired with. Manalysis: Shotgun is still manly, even if it's too small for Heavy to use without looking hunched over. In fact, that makes him look crazy intense. If only it looked cooler... Sandvich Grade: 10 Manliness: 7 Description: Sandvich is an unlockable weapon for Heavy that isn't a weapon at all. Sandvich can be eater to restore all of your health, and must be replenished by a cooldown meter or medpack before it can be used again. With secondary fire, you can throw it on the ground for yourself or teamates to have it function like a medium medpack. Perfect when you don't have time to sit and chomp on it. Synergy: Sandvich works well with default minigun and Tomislav, as both have no need for a sidearm to supplement them. Avoid using with slower weapons, as you'll only have your melee to fall back on. Manliness: Your lunch is not only a loose cannon, but a damn good cop. Dalokahs Bar Grade: 1 Manliness: 2 Description: The Dalohkas bar functions like a very weak Sandvich, but without the advantage of M2 functionality and the added bonus of increasing your max health by 50 for a brief time. The bonus does not stack with overheal, so medics make it useless. Synergy: Dalohkas bar can see some use with Brass Beast, as the boost can make up for the time it takes to spin up, but only once. The defensive nature of Brass Beast also makes it easier to predict when to chow down so the effect isn't wasted. Manalysis: There is nothing manly about eating candy like a pig, much less pretending it is the vastly superior sandvich. Buffalo Steak Sandvich Grade: 7 Manliness: 10 Description: The Buffalo Steak is a food item that retains the Sandvich's M2 functionality, but replaces the primary full heal with a melee only speed boost that also grants minicrits to your attacks. It also makes enemies minicrit you, ala crit-a-cola. The Buffalo Steak sandvich is good for the heavy that rarely noms their sandvich and simply prefers to M2 it, so the full heal they never use is replaced by a utility. Synergy: Buffalo Steak pairs well with anything Sandvich would, but on a more unique note, Fists of Steel users may like the buffalo steak sandvich to beef up their pummel sessions even if it means they are locked to it for a time. Buffalo Steak Sandvich also compliments the Eviction Notice nicely. Manalysis: By using the Steackvich, you agree to a document that says your idea of kicking ass is biting into a raw steak, calling it a sandvich as if bread and vegetation is for the weak, and punching a mercenary group to death with your fists, like a fat, Russian Chuck Norris. The Family Business Grade: 6 Manliness: 7 Description: The Family Business is a shotgun that trades some power for 2 extra rounds in the clip. The power loss is hardly significant, so in loadouts where a shotgun is a good idea, it excels. In loadouts where a shotgun is unneeded, it's even more terrible than the default. Synergy: When you pack a Brass Beast, this is usually what you want. Heavy's high health means the power penalty is hardly a problem, and the higher clip means you can more reliably defend yourself. Manalysis: See shotgun, and then add points for how much cooler the Family Business looks. Fishcake Manliness: 6 Manalysis: Fish is good for the aspiring man, but claiming it is a sandvich is not. Tiers: Sandvich Steak Family Business Shotgun Dalokahs Sandvich is simply amazing. That is universally agreed. It should be used unless your loadout calls for something else, such as using Brass Beast or FoS. Steak is a utility sandvich that retains its most useful feature, so it lends itself to specialized sets. Family business is the superior shotgun, so it's original counter part and the hilariously bad Dalokahs sit at the bottom, and should be ignored. Melee Fists Grade: 5 Manliness: 10 Description: Stock melee, but for Heavy, it is a nice emergency weapon, especially if caught while eating a food item. Notably, the taunt is lethal to any enemy who is unaware of the Heavy's presence. Synergy: Fists don't generally work well with much, but the taunt kill can be a boon. Manalysis: So, you want to kill the enemy team with your bare goddamn hands, huh? And not just ANY bare hands, but bare hands that can shoot MIND BULLETS. Pair with steak sandvich for maximum manliness! Killing Gloves of Boxing Grade: 6 Manliness: 8 Description: The KGB is a Melee weapon that trades the taunt kill and some swing speed for critboosts on kill. While this means you can go on rampages, punching the enemy out one by one with powerful blows, your other weapons shouldn't be neglected. Synergy: Works well with loadouts involving a shotgun, especially Brass Beast. The defense Heavy has no need to rush, so no GRU is needed. Fists of Steel are also impractical if you cannot spinup in a reasonable amount of time, so KGB doesn't cut any losses and makes that shot gun of your's much more dangerous if you can score a kill. Additionally, it KGB can be used with Tomislav, as the fast rev means you can take advantage of the crits more effectively than other miniguns. Manalysis: Boxing Gloves are noticeably more lame than bare hands, but unstoppable rampages are awesome, so it still scores high. Gloves of Running Urgently Grade: 9 Manliness: 4 Description: the GRU increases the Heavy's running speed in return for making your melee attacks worthless. While sprinting, the Heavy loses health at 6 HP per tick. The Gru is often the best melee choice for a Heavy, as it counteracts one of his biggest weaknesses; not being able to reach the front lines quickly. Synergy: Minigun, Tomislav, Sandvich. The GRU is for the Heavy who needs to move around, primarily offense Heavies. Thus, you will need a a minigun that can spin up in time to fight enemies once you reach the field. Sandvich, particularly M2 sandvich, can help you cope with the HP drain. The GRU is a poor choice when using Steak, since the minicrits won't make the abysmal damage any better and the speed boosts do not stack. Manliness: Flaming boxing gloves. That are used to run. Cool weapon, lame use. Warrior's Spirit Grade: 2 Manliness: 6 Description: This melee trades away 20 of the Heavy's HP for stronger melee attacks. Fact of the matter is, your primary is still stronger, and Heavy melee kills are to rare to justify the missing HP chunk. A side effect of the the lower HP is healthpacks are slightly less effective on you. Synergy: Warrior's Spirit doesn't do well with much, althoug Dalohkas can undo the penalty for a time. Chances are, you'll not do anything in those 60 seconds to justify the drop in the first place, so they are best avoided altogether. Manalysis: We wanted to score this higher for being bear claws with pun potential, then realized all those puns could be conversted to truth by using Fists. Shame. Fist of Steel Grade: 7 Manliness: 7 Description: Fists of Steel are a tool for Heavies who want increased defense, or to go on Melee rampages. The fists of steel, while out, will reduce most damage by around half, but melee hits will hurt for double. This lends them to surprise attacks, or to use as a shield of sorts while running from place to place. Synergy: The FoS are a great defensive tool for any heavy, but Tomislavs will especially enjoy luring enemies in for melee only to pull out their gun and make swiss cheese of them. Buffalo Steak is a good choice as well when using FoS, as it can be used to heal AND to make your own attacks pack more punch. Manalysis: Fists of Steel are rad, on account of being steel gloves. Eviction Notice Grade: 4 Manliness: 5 Description: The Eviction notice drops a lot of power for a huge boost to swing speed. Arguably, they are about as effective as standard fists but with no taunt kill, and critical hits are less threatening. Synergy: Buffalo Steak Sandvich. Turning your rapid punches into guaranteed minicrits makes your damage output go from unimpressive to noticeable, and the rapid swings mean that your enemies will generally die a bit quicker than the same strategy with oter melees would. Manalysis: Not much to say. Brass knuckles. Nice. Tiers: GRU FoS KGB Fists Eviction Notice Warrior's Spirit GRU is an amazing utility, more so than the FoS which are also great. KGB works well for defense heavies, but Fists, eviction notice, and Warrior's Spirit aren't suited to anything and so are generally inferior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted September 4, 2011 Author Share Posted September 4, 2011 ENGIE Primary Shotgun Grade: 8 Manliness: 5 Description: Same old shotgun. It's just as reliable and powerful as before, nothing new. Synergy: Still goes well with everything. Manalysis: Still cool, but engineers aren't manly by default and shotgun doesn't save him. Frontier Justice Grade: 7 Manliness: 6 Description: The Frontier Justice is a shotgun with half the clip and a gimmick. The gimmick is, when your sentry is destroyed, you get a number of guaranteed crits; 1 for each assist the sentry scored and 2 for each kill. Synergy: It's quite alright with either Sentry Gun type, but it leaves you very vulnerable if you do not have crits on you, so try to take the pistol. Manalysis: It looks cooler than the shotgun, especially when glowing with death. Widow Maker Grade: 1 Manliness: 3 Description: A shotgun that uses metal to fire and converts the damage you do into metal. At 65 metal per shot, you only have three rounds until you're out provided you don't hit anyone, making it high risk, no reward. The biggest net gain you can obtain is 40-ish metal, and that's only under optimal circumstances. Synergy: Nothing, as an Engie NEEDS his metal, and Widow Maker is counter productive to that no matter how you use it. Manalysis: It's an unattractive, boxy, toy looking gun. And performs like one, too. Nope. Tiers: Shotgun Frontier Justice Widow Maker It's hard to really stick to this as Gunslinger Engie is almost it's own class, but even there the more reliable shotgun may have an edge over the frontier justice, even if the FJ can do insane amounts of damage to the enemy team. Secondary Pistol Grade: 7 Manliness: 3 Description: The pistol is as it was on Scout, now with more ammo and reliability! Synergy: Pistol works well with Gunslinger minisentries, and any loadout using Frontier Justice. Manalysis: See Scout. Same unfortunate problems. Wrangler Grade: 5 Manliness: 4 Description: The Wrangler is a tool that lets you control your sentry, giving it improved range, damage, and a shield that absorbs damage. The Wrangler is one of the easiest weapons to use incorrectly, a bad use of the Wrangler can lose the entire game for your team, as it makes the nest much more vulnerable. Synergy: Anything not called Frontier Justice, Gunslinger, or ESPECIALLY both. Manalysis: It's got two good points; it looks like an Atari controller, and has reference potential. Still not that cool. Short Circuit Grade: 5 Manliness: 3 Description: The Short Circuit is a tool that destroys non-bullet (hitscan) projectiles, such as rockets, sticky bombs, arrows, and more. Use it to protect your sentry from incoming explosives. Synergy: Look at the Wrangler. Same applies. Manalysis: Barriers are for sissies! And the thing is absolutely worthless as a weapon with it's 5 damage maximum. Tiers: Pistol Wrangler Shortcircuit This is another hard one to decide. All three have their place as perfect sidegrades on normal wrenches, but Gunslinger HAS to have pistol or he's doing it wrong, so pistol wins with the other two at a tie. Melee Wrench Grade: 5 Manliness: 5 Description: Stock melee weapon that allows the use of standard sentry guns, which can be upgraded into a tough, powerful aimbot for area protection. Synergy: Sans Gunslinger, any and all of Engie's melees work with any weapon. Manalysis: Smackin' people with a big wrench, oh yeah! Gunslinger Grade: 5 Manliness: 6 Description: This is one of those hard-to-grade weapons as it completely changes the Engineer's style of play. Gunslinger increases HP and replaces the sentry with the mini-sentry, a fast building lvl 1 with slightly less DPS. This suits a more offensive Engineer. Synergy: Frontier Justice can make a lot of use of the minisentry with an even different playstyle, and all secondaries exceot pistol are pointless on it. Manalysis: A robot arm is cool. Engie is not. A nice balance at 6 is struck. Southern Hospitality Grade: 6 Manliness: 5 Description: A wrench with bleed effects added at the cost of fire vulnerability. It's almost a straight upgrade to the Wrench as pyros should rarely get close to you, and if they do, chances are you're dead anyway. Synergy: See Wrench. Manalysis: See Wrench. Jag Grade: 6 Manliness: 5 Description: The Jag trades off damage for faster building, but only while you bang on them while they construct. Again, it's pretty much superior to the Wrench in every way. Synergy: See Wrench. Manalysis: See Wrench. Golden Wrench Manliness: 10 Manalysis: The Golden Wrench is the holy grail of TF2 weapons. Only 100 were ever distributed, and even less than that exist today. The Golden Wrench was given to the extremely lucky few to craft one randomly during a certain period of time, and many backpacks were outright emptied persuing the legendary tool. If you have one, consider yourself the envy of players everywhere, and if you see one, honor the moment. Tiers: Jag Southern Hospitality Gunslinger Wrench The two top wrenches are pretty much the normal wrench with unnoticable downsides and easily used upsides. The Gunslinger changes the Engineer entirely, but on the whole it's not as effective as a pure level 3. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mr. N Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 Sorry for the topic bump but will you ever cover the Medic, Sniper & Spy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted October 11, 2011 Author Share Posted October 11, 2011 Yeah, I'm just a lazy git is all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted October 14, 2011 Author Share Posted October 14, 2011 MEDIC Primary Syringe Gun Grade: 6 Manliness: 4 Description: This is the medic's backup weapon. He will use this during a retreat, and to be a completely terrible, utterly useless combat medic. The latter is bad, don't do it. Synergy: Syringe gun is the medic's first choice in nearly any situation. It has good passive health regen and is a surprisingly deadly weapon to any foe foolish enough to underestimate it. Manalysis: As cool as a gun that shoots needles (AKA the embodiment of fear) is, infecting foes with diseases is low. Secondly, the syringe gun is a retreat tool, a coward means for a coward class. Blutsauger Grade: 5 Manliness: 6 Description: As common with all weapon variants in TF2, Blutsauger has an advantage over the stock syringes, and a disadvantage. The advantage is health leeching, every needle that hits a target is 3 more HP to your reserves. However, your passive regen is nerfed considerably. Synergy: Rather than with weapons, the blutsauger's overall helpfulness depends on what PLAYERS you bring along. Sacrificing regen is a big deal. That 3 HP per second at MINIMUM regeneration helps more than most know, and in the long run will prove more sustaining. However, the blutsauger offers more survivability in hostile situations. Thus, the decision lies in your team. Are they dumb and leaving you vulnerable? The bluts may help more. Are they protective of you? Then focus on healing them while your passive regen patches you up. Manalysis: The two point difference between this and syringe gun lies entirely in that you get to pretend you are a telekinetic vampire. Awesome! Crusader's Crossbow Grade: 2 Manliness: 9 Description: The crossbow is an unfortunate weapon. It trades off your set of 40 syringes, for 1. Well, more like an arrow, but the fact is you need to rely on this cumbersome, slow-reloading shot for defense and it isn't even great. The damage it causes at threat-range (see; the ranges you'd pull it out to protect yourself) is pathetic, and the long-range healing it boasts is situational, hard to take advantage of, and when you DO offers no uber bonus and just takes away HP you could have been charging with. So what's the upside? Item set! Synergy: The crossbow is worthless on its own. However, equipping it with the Amputator increases your passive regen rate. This means you can take more abuse at the cost of relying ENTIRELY on your team for protection. Is that worth it? It really depends on the player and team, but generally, having a safety weapon is a more reliable bet. Crossbow/amputator users may also favor the quickfix, as the quick fix builds uber at the same rate regardless if the patient has full HP or not, thus meaning crossbow users can't waste uber building opportunities. Manalysis: Awww, what's that? Scout has a boo boo? Let's make it all better by IMPALING YOU THROUGH THE FACE WITH MY CROSSBOW. Overdose Grade: 5 Manliness:4 Description: The Overdose is an option for the non-confrontational medic. As he has higher uber, his movement speed increases while he holds the Overdose. Like the equalizer, this is best put to use in fleeing, and the downside emphasizes it. Each syringe does approximately 1 less damage than stock syringes. On paper, that seems negligible. However, you have to stop and think how it all adds up. Out of a clip of fourty syringes, if only 20 hit, then that's 20 less damage than you would have made with stock. It really adds up. Synergy: This one is all preference. Are you terrible with fending off attackers and would rather just make a faster escape? This is the gun for you. Fact of the matter is, though, running won't always save you. Scouts will always catch you even at max speed, for instance. It's probably better to just backpedal and shoot with the more threatening syringes, although the overdose can be a capable self defense weapon in its own right. Manalysis: see the syringe gun Tiers: Syringe Gun Overdose Blutsauger Crossbow Syringe gun is most reliable, without a doubt. It has all the good and no bads. The middle two are a tossup depending on your personal focus, but running faster to rejoin your team might be more handy in higher level play. The crossbow sits at the bottom with its unfortunately clunkiness and worthlessness, saved only by an attribute it indirectly causes. Secondary Medigun Grade: 10 Manliness: 7 Description: The medigun is what the medic is about. This thing restores HP to team mates. It can buff their max HP to 150%. It even comes packaged with 8 seconds of godmode. The medigun is incredible and any player whose half competent at the game will tell you that the medic is the most important part of the team. This is why. Synergy: Anything and everything. The differences between the medic's mediguns are the uber charge functionality, and the standard's grants invincibility. It's handy in both offensive and defensive scenarios. Manalysis: Ever watched Meet the Medic? Yeah. Kritzkreig Grade: 9 Manliness: 8 Description: Like the normal medigun, but the uber charge forces weapons to fire critical hits. This throws a whole new style onto the Medic, as the classes who can use both types of uber are different on each side. A Kritz Heavy is meeeeaaan, as is a Kritz Demo or Soldier. Almost anything will wreck with a kritzkreig on them, but not the case in standard uber. Heavies for instance are too clunky and slow to take full advantage, as enemies can simply run. Synergy: The Kritzkrieg lends itself to defense more than offense. I said that right. You think it'd be the other way around, as the kritzkreig's sole purpose is to make things explode, but a kritz target won't beat the most common defensive measure there is; the sentry gun. So it's instead smarter to use medigun in offensive scenarios to push in, and better to use kritz in defensive ones to gib problematic attackers. Manalysis: Glowing guns inspire fear. Glowing guns that are coursing with electricty. Quick Fix Grade: 7 Manliness: 6 Description: The odd man out. The Quick Fix differs from the other mediguns in that it will not over heal. That's TERRIBLE. Really, it is. Overheal wins battles, as a squad of 300 HP soldiers will beat a squad of 200 HP soldiers. However, the quick fix makes up for it in raw speed. The heal rate is faster than normal mediguns (fun fact, a quick fix heavy-medic versus a normal heavy medic will end with the quick fix medic winning) and to top it off, it gets uber pretty much every 30 seconds. Synergy: As mentioned above, it suffers least from the crossbow combo's downsides, but the quick fix is another style change. The medic will do terribly attached to one target. He HAS to make sure EVERYONE is getting the love to compete. But even still, his team will be wiped by other medics using the other mediguns. How does he counter this? Sheer overwhelming pressure. Unlike other mediguns, your uber is NOT a precious commodity. It's not something to store for when it is needed. When you get an uber, USE IT. The Quick Fix uber lacks invulnerability, but it will do the next best thing and -very- rapidly heal your patient. The idea is that if you save a quick fix uber, by the time you use it you could have attained 3 seperate charges. Seriously, use them and overwhelm the enemy team before they are ready with their stronger uber charges, you can pop faster and annihilate them, and then do it again less than a minute later. Manalysis: It lacks the cool things the others have, but still makes up for it in its MAD SCIENTIST appearance. Tiers: Medigun Kritzkreig Quick Fix It's easy to see why. Complete invulnerability is wonderful. Too wonderful. More wonderful than guaranteed crits, but only a bit more so. The quick fix is also good, but not in the league of its peers. However, it can shine above them with clever and well timed uses of Mega Heal. Melee Bonesaw Grade: 1 Manliness: 3 Description: The bonesaw is nothing new. It's every class's stock melee ever. However, this one sucks because there is NO REASON to use it at all, other than simply being a new player. Synergy: Nothing. Don't use the bonesaw. Ever. If you can help it. Manalysis: It doesn't even look cool. Some people claim to still use the bonesaw because it's the original, underappreciated weapon. Hipsters. Ubersaw Grade: 8 Manliness: 7 Description: The ubersaw is arguably the best Medic melee. The bad: it swings slightly slower. The good: every hit you land charges uber by 25%. Yes, that's huge. Unless using QuickFix, then it's only alright. Synergy: Ubersaw will never do you wrong. There'll be a time eventually when you hit someone with a melee strike. You'll kick yourself if you weren't carrying ubersaw at the time. As metioned, Quick Fix isn't so great with it. It charges fast enough on its own, the 25% bonus the ubersaw grants seems much less exciting when you can get that much in 5 seconds of healing. Manalysis: Apparently, uber is powered by the souls of your enemies. The ubersaw sucks a team colored... liquid into a container, which apparently fuels the ubercharge. Wicked. Vita-Saw Grade: 7 Manalysis: 6 Description: Vita-saw is life insurance. If you die, you carry over 20% uber. Not 20% of what you had, but 20% static. This makes dying less of a bummer, but on the flip side, it becomes easier to die, as your max health is only 140 while carrying the item. Synergy: Don't let that scare you off, though. It pairs well with all but the quick fix. Especially the kritzkrieg, as there's a more inherent risk of death without invulnerability. Manalysis: Meh, but it's a bioshock reference! Look at it! Amputator Grade: 4 Manliness: 5 Description: The amputator is... alright. It's an upgrade to the bonesaw in every way; functionality, looks, everything. It functions the same, but it has an added feature. When taunting, you heal nearby team mates like a dispenser. It's really not that helpful, especially since no uber is gained in doing so and no overheal. However, it's a component of the Medival Medic set, mentioned above, so it gets points there. Synergy: If using the Amputator, use the crossbow. If using crossbow, consider Quick Fix. Manalysis: Nothing to really say. You turn into a bard. That's kinda alright, as long as you're not Edward. Solemn Vow Grade: 7 Manliness: 10 Description: Like the amputator, the Solemn Vow is identical to the bonesaw, but with an added ability. Passively, the medic can see the name and HP of enemies. While not much use to the medic himself, with proper communication it can let the team know a -lot- about who to go for. Synergy: The Solemn Vow works best with blutsauger, as when you have a weapon designed to fight off attackers, it helps to know if they are vulnerable. Manalysis: Clubbing people to death with a bust of a man who said the ironic quote engraved on it. Beautiful, it really makes the Medic seem like the mad doctor he is. Tiers: Ubersaw Vitasaw Solemn Vow Amputator Bonesaw As if it surprised anyone that Ubersaw was top dog. It literally changes games. Even tagging an enemy ONCE is a huge uber advantage. Below it is vita saw and solemn vow respectively, with vita saw having the edge. Amputator isn't really special compared to the others, and Bonesaw is the worst choice you can make, period. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted October 14, 2011 Author Share Posted October 14, 2011 SNIPER Primary Sniper Rifle Grade: 8 Manliness: 2 Description: The sniper rifle is standard FPS fare. It has a scope, which you center on enemy player's heads, and then you make them wait a few seconds to respawn. The one in TF2 has something new, though, it charges up to do more damage! Sniper Rifle is the deadliest long range weapon in the game, especially in skilled hands. Synergy: As that this is the whole point of the sniper, almost everything in his arsenal exists to support it in different ways. Manalysis: Ew. Look at it. It's unimpressive, cowardly, and ugh. And he calls himself an Austrailian... Huntsman Grade: 5 Manliness: 3 Description: This changes everything. It's not even a long range weapon! It's MID range. It's basically a powerful single shot projectile that can headshot. It's ungodly annoying and inferior to the sniper rifle in all ways but one; fun. The Huntsman is fun to use. It's fun making people hate you while you get lucky shots. That said, it's a very capable weapon, but it's just that; capable. It' not great or even particularly useful. Synergy: Ditch that SMG. Put on either of the shields instead, or Jarate if you feel like being supportive to your team as well. Manalysis: It's still a stupid weapon. This is 1960 for god's sake, we're not cave men. You AND your stupid face on the kill cam look like a retarded monkey!!! Sorry. We swear we're not bitter. Sydney Sleeper Grade: 6 Manliness: 2 Description: Trades off the ability to headshot for faster charge time and covering your target in Jarate. Not a bad deal, really. The standard rifle is still better, but it's easier to be consistently helpful, if less so, using this. Synergy: Leave behind the Jarate. SMG is actually a nice compliment to this weapon, as mini crits have no damage falloff. Manalysis: Seeing a theme, here? Bazaar Bargain Grade: 7 Manliness: 4 Description: The Bazaar Bargain is a weird one. It gets better when you do good. It gets worse as you do bad. The charge time increases or decreases based on your accuracy. Synergy: Anything, really. Manalysis: Still unmanly, but at least this one oozes confidence. When we see a Sniper packing this thing, we assume he's good; or at least good enough to take advantage of it. Machina Grade: 8 Manliness: 6 Description: The bad: no noscopes, tracer rounds. The good: piercing, higher damage. It's hard to say if this is better than the stock rifle or not, but it's good, for sure. Synergy: No noscopes calls for an SMG. Alternatively, jarate/bushwacka. Manalysis: It suffers for the same things its kin does, but it looks really, really cool. It also SOUNDS cool. On top of that, tracer rounds, while being revealing, are also intimidating. Tiers: Machina Sniper Rifle Bazaar Bargain Sydney Sleeper Huntsman The machina pierces targets and can kill multiple foes in one shot. That may just be good enough to excuse close range vulnerability. The bazaar I placed a bit lower since no one is perfect. The Sleeper rests at the bottom, not counting the weirdo that is the huntsman. Secondary SMG Grade: 4 Manliness: 4 Description: The Sniper's fallback weapon. Let's get this out of the way, SMG is terrible. It really is. It should be used only as the Medic's syringes would, as a defensive measure. Synergy: Sleeper and Machina have the most use for this thing. Manalysis: Not really. It's a really dumb looking gun. It's weak. It has only three short lived clips of ammo. Better than the rifles, still. Jarate Grade: 7 Manliness: 1 Description: This is what you should usually be carrying. It's a wonderful support tool. It roots out spies, and tags important foes for focused fire. It can also put out fires. It's wonderful. Synergy: Bushwacka, for sure. Otherwise it should be the standard for all primaries. Manalysis: Throwing jars of piss. Manly, or stupid? Stupid. Razorback Grade: 2 Manliness: 1 Description: The razor back takes up space. Really, that's all it does. It has exactly one use for exactly one weapon from one class. It blocks a backstab. News flash, spies have guns. Guns that will kill you before you can react. Synergy: The ONLY time you should wear this is if you stay in the midlines. It might discourage or interupt a chainstab. Manalysis: No, no, no. No, you don't look "cool." you look like a hobo trying his best to gear up for hiding. Darwin's Danger Sheild Grade: 3 Manliness: 4 Description. Passive HP buff. That's it, move along. Synergy: There's no reason to use this unless you're in the front lines. And then, you're using Huntsman. Avoid all other times. Manalysis: At least it's better than the razor back, being the skin of a crocodile and all. Tiers: Jarate SMG Danger Shield Razorback Jarate is too good to give up for anything other than the SMG in most cases. Even then, the SMG isn't terribly helpful. The danger shield has some use, but seriously, the razorback is bad and Snipers should stop using it. Melee Kukri Grade: 5 Manliness: 5 Description: Same ol stock melee weapon. Synergy: Nothing, really. It works okay, but... Manalysis: NOW THIS IS A KNOIFE Tribalman's Shiv Grade: 6 Manliness: 4 Description: Slightly less initial damage, bleed effect. Adds up for more damage overall. The bleed effect can scare off attackers, reveal spies, and kill someone off after you've already died. Synergy: Like the Kukri, this thing just doesn't pair with much. It works, and works well, with no tricks. Manalysis: The Sniper has a trend of looking dumb with his weapons. Who does he think he is, Tarzan? Bushwacka Grade: 8 Manliness: 2 Description: The bushwacka makes you more flamable, but functions like the Pyro's axtinguisher. The bushwacka will crit when it'd normally minicrit. Synergy: Jarate. Use Jarate. Manalysis: When you have to rely on pissing people to kill, you've gone wrong. Although, we suppose buff banner also works, but eh. Shahansha Grade: 6 Manliness: 3 Description: Much like the equalizer, but without the speed boost. Synergy: Nothin' much Manalysis: Naaah. Using this pretty much screams you expect to fail. Tiers: Bushwacka Shiv Shahansha Kukri Bushwacka is the undisputed best, followed by the versatility of the shiv. The shahansha can save you, and the kukri is nothing much special. Basic stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted October 14, 2011 Author Share Posted October 14, 2011 SPY Primary Revolver Grade: 5 Manliness: 7 Description: This right here is what separates good spies from the bad. The revolver is a capable defense weapon, and an excellent assassination tool. The gun is weak, but spies can see enemy HP. They can snipe wounded targets and buildings easily. Synergy: Almost anything Manalysis: It's a revolver! Those are cool, and spies using it are cool, because it's the first step to not being worthless! Ambassador Grade: 6 Manliness: 9 Description: For advanced users, we have a revolver variant that's worse at self defense, and better at assassination. A headshot does 100 damage clean, but bidy shots are even weaker. Really skilled spies can make this weapon a huge nuisance. Synergy: Maybe deadringer, as using Ambassador means you are less likely to successfully defend yourself. Manalysis: Take the above, but taken to an eleven. It has an engraving of the Scout's mom (Take THAT!) on it, but so many spies fail at using this thing to its full potential. L'etranger Grade: 3 Manliness: 3 Description: This gun is pretty terrible. HORRIBLY weak damage, but each hit restores some cloak. If you get caught with this, you're pretty screwed unless you can slip away cloaked. Don't count on that. Synergy: YER for Saharan Spy set, Dead Ringer. Manalysis: See above, but lowered many notches. And the fact that this thing is used only for escaping... Enforcer Grade: 8 Manliness: 2 Description: Sacrifice some stealth for some serious stopping power. The Enforcer is extremely powerful for its accuracy and can down most attackers in three quick shots. Synergy: Dead ringer has no drawbacks for this thing. If you use dead ringer, ALWAYS use Enforcer. If not using DR, consider it anyway. Manalysis: There is no reason a snub nosed pistol should be so strong. It looks and sounds weak, so HOW? Carriers of this weapon are guilty of breaking the laws of reality, which isn't as cool as it sounds in this case. Diamondback Grade: 4 Manliness: 10 Description: The Diamondback sacrifices power for guaranteed crits, ala Frontier Justice. For each building you sap, you get one crit shot. Synergy: maybe C&D best Manalysis: This gun makes the coolest sounds in the game. It looks cool, too. The crits sound like cannons! Big Kill Manliness: 5 Manalysis: It's hard for me to be fair, I've not seen Sam and Max, but this is a standard cartoony gun. It's average. Tiers: Enforcer Ambassador Revolver Diamondback L'etranger Enforcer is great, Ambassador has some clever uses attached to it, and from there we have averageness until the L'etranger, which is NEVER good except with the set, and even then it serves as the biggest downside. Secondary Invisi Watch Grade: 9 Manliness: 2 Description: Completely cloaks the Spy for 9 seconds. It's useful for all the obvious reasons, and it's very versatile. Synergy: All things work well Manalysis: It's cowardly, obviously. Cloak and Dagger Grade: 4 Manliness: 2 Description: A faster-draining watch that can't replenish itself on metal. The upside is infinite cloak as long as you stand still to let it refill. Synergy: This watch is generally pretty bad. However, it has uses. A tip to new spies: learn with the normal watch. Bith this and dead ringer make bad habits. Manalysis: see above Dead Ringer Grade: 6 Manliness: 1 Description: A watch that only cloaks you on a fake-death, which is done by taking damage while holding it out. It also gives you a huuuuge damage resistance and perfect cloak. Synergy: A lot of things compliment dead ringer. Like the Enforcer, most notably. Manalysis: I HATE dead ringer. Nothing is more downright noobish and cowardly. Dead ringer undoes the mistakes your dumbass got into and bails you out with what amounts to an uber. Tiers: Invisi Watch Dead Ringer Cloak and Dagger Invisiwatch is most versatile, and all around best. Dead Ringer is also good, but most things it does, IW does better. Except for getting past choke points. Cloak and Dagger is terrible in all but expert hands, as the intermediate Spy won't know the first thing of efficiency under its restrictions. Melee Knife Grade: 8 Manliness: 4 Description: The knife is the weakest stock melee in the game. However, it has a secret; the backstabs. Back stabs are instant kills, and of course are done by attacking someone's back. Synergy: Suits all, being stock. Reliable. Manalysis: We don't need to tell you it's cowardly, etc. Your Eternal Reward Grade: 5 Manliness: 5 Description: No disguising! On your own, anyhow. You disguise as whomever you backstab, instantly, fooling sentry guns even. It also makes the kill silent. It disposes of the body, shows nothing in the kill feed, and hushes any death yells. Synergy: It works okay with about anything, but try not to use anything more powerful than the stock revolver. Shoooting breaks the disguise, and you can't get it back again until you make another stab. Manalysis: Gains a point for being like The Thing. Conniver's Kunai Grade: 3 Manliness: 6 Description: Low health, but you take all the enemie's on a backstab to a cap of 180. Generally pretty bad. Synergy: Dead Ringer compliments it well. The big weakness is fraility, but the dead ringer makes you a total tank. It also allows you to get away cleanly with your new health boost, rather than loosing it in the escape. Manalysis: Gets some points for being like Dracula. Vampires are awesome! Big Earner Grade: 5 Manliness: 5 Description: Sacrifice a bit of health (nowhere near as much as Kunai though) for a cloak boost on kills. Synergy: Matches up with Dead Ringer alright, but other watches also benefit greatly. However, the HP penalty is indeed a problem without Dead Ringer to shield you in all it's glorious stupidity. Manalysis: It puts the emphisis on assassination. That counterbalances the cowardliness somewhat... Tiers: Knife YER Big Earner Kunai Reliablity first. Any and all HP penalties are a huge risk you can do without, and YER is only situational. Thus, stick with the knife unless you have a plan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted October 15, 2011 Author Share Posted October 15, 2011 And finally, sets. How does each one stack up? What are strengths and weaknesses? This section will also go into a litle bit more strategic detail that the weapon lists didn't much call for. The "sets" in here will consist of polycount sets (the kind that has bonuses), stock loadout, and unlock loadout. All in all, sets are no big deal except 8, which actually make a difference. In almost all cases, it's best to mix and match items to suit your preference and needs. Still, though, sometimes wearing a whole set can be fun, and can make enemies see you as a different class altogether. Scout Stock set --- Scattergun Pistol Bat --- Nice setup. It's equipped to deal with any type of foe by using the most reliable primary and the most all around useful secondary. The bat, however, is a weak component, it has none of the utility others of its slot has. Unlock set --- Force-a-nature Bonk Sandman --- And not-so-nice. Expect a theme of this. The Scout's set of unlocks don't compliment each other well. The sandman lowers health, which makes FaN even riskier than normal, and doubly so with no back up weapon. Bonk is used for slipping through enemies and assassination, something FaN is also pretty awful at because of knockback. Special Delivery --- Shortstop Mad Milk Holy Mackeral --- This is one of the sets that grants a bonus when it is all used together (including the hat, for this and four others' cases) and this one is very solid. It uses the shortstop, a good weapon in its own right, and mad milk, a good support item justified by the pistol being impractical with shortstop. Between mid range efficiency and the milk's healing, you got survivability, even moreso with the +25 HP on the set bonus. Mackeral is again just... there. #1 Fan --- Soda Popper Winger Atomizer --- Atomizer is good on any loadout you put it on, and Soda Popper is a very capable primary. So that leaves the unfortunate winger. The winger is almost never worth it, and the only thing holding this set back from being great. Fact of the matter is, any other secondary will do better. Except maybe Criticola. If you must show your love for Bonk products, though, the best time to make use of the winger is under Hype minicrits. Those certainly sting. Of all of them, Special Delivery set is the only one worth routinely using, with #1 fan in a distant second. It's a shame the Winger sucks so bad. Despite all this, again it's best to mix and match. Every single set has a weakness in it that should be changed. SOLDIER Stock set --- Rocket Launcher Shotgun Shovel --- The rocket launcher is pretty much the Soldier's best primary, and the shotgun is pretty much his best secondary. Then there's the shovel, which should never be used in any circumstances short of having nothing else to equip. Unlock set --- Direct Hit Buff Banner Equalizer --- This is a -very- hard set to use. The direct hit is a very powerful item, but unreliable. It has to hit the target dead on to be good, and four strikes you're out. No back up weapon. At least the Equalizer can help you escape if things go bad, or at least serve as a last stand. Soldiers using this set should consider staying in the mid lines. There, they can safely shoot at targets to build rage, which should help every team mate on the front. Tank Buster --- Black Box Batallion's Backup --- This is another set that grants a bonus. Sentry damage resistance, now you can tank them a little longer! However, the name and ability suggests this set is good for taking down sentries. It is not, three rockets will not destroy a sentry that is being repaired. Instead, this set makes the Soldier a tank himself. The Black Box is one of THOSE rocket launchers. The ones that take away a rocket. The battalion's back up is notably terrible as a backup weapon. Thus, the Soldier is offensively crippled. He can still cause damage, but WILL lose lasting fire fights. This is why he should focus instead on staying alive to deliver his buff, which will not only make him heartier, but all of the team as well. This is the first set to only cover two slots. The melee weapon is up to you, but to complete the Support soldier loadout, try the Disciplinary Action. Alternatively, Equalizer will help you in staying alive, as always. Particularly ballsy Soldiers can equip the pain train to soak up more damage for more rage, and to pull sneaky point caps, and finally the Half Zatoichi also fits well with the survivability theme. Try knocking an enemy into the air, and finishing them with a Zatoichi strike to fully restore HP! The General's Formals --- Mantreads Disciplinary Action --- Another two item set. The General's Formals is an odd set. The Mantreads are pretty terrible. Their "goomba stomp" attack is nothing fancy, unweildy, and not that damaging. The best thing they do is reduce knockback. Well, more like negate it completely. Sentries won't push you around, airblasts will only sorta nudge you, and other soldiers won't be able to juggle you easily. The disciplinary action supports the boots in no way at all, it's a pure support item. Primary is up to you. If you want to take advantage of the Mantreads THAT badly, get Rocket Jumper. But this is an ineffective choice, so it may be better to take along the cow mangler so you have a compensation for the lack of side arm. Airborne Armaments --- Liberty Launcher Reserve Shooter Market Gardener --- The Airborne Armaments is a set that focuses on, as suggested, airborne combat, but all in different ways. The Liberty Launcher is a fast firing rocket that does 2 things better than the stock rocket launcher; airshots, and juggles. The reserve shooter minicrits airborne enemies, so it's a good idea to swap to it quickly to finish an enemy you just popped into the air. The Market Gardener crits if you use it mid-rocket jump, which the reserve shooter helps with its faster switch time. The components of the set work well together, but it'll leave the Soldier vulnerable in long fights and the Market Gardener is extremely hard to make use of. Soldiers using this set do best at mid range, where they could take advantage of all three weapons as needed; liberty Launcher makes mid range combat easier, reserve shooter is more accurate, and you could rocket jump a melee to the enemy's face, if the terrain allows. Dr. Grordbort's Victory Pack --- Cow Mangler 5000 Righteous Bison --- The futuristic weapon pack. The Victory Pack makes the Soldier USELESS against Engineers; mostly. The laser weapons do next to no damage to buildings, but a charge shot can disable them for a second. The Bison sucks. It does, so this set is therefore bad. May as well just use the Cow Mangler, which is pretty alright, standalone. The Airborne Armaments is probably the most notably game changing and viable set. The Tank Buster is alright for a strictly defensive Soldier, but all others are just unnoticable or have -horrible- components in them. PYRO Stock set --- Flamethrower Shotgun Fireaxe --- In a rare exception, the Pyro's stock weaponry is horrible. Flamethrower's really got nothing going for it, and the Fire axe is -completely awful.- Don't use this. Unlock Set --- Backburner Flaregun Axtinguisher --- All of the components are good. But good together? No. Backburner and Axtinguisher are redundant. When using Backburner, Axtinguisher really has no place, and vice versa. Gas Jockey's Gear --- Degreaser Powerjack --- Another set bonus set, this one makes the Pyro move faster but ends up more vulnerable to bullet damage. The Gas Jockey's set is for the sneaky Pyro. Degreaser is best suited for puff n sting, but the Powerjack will have to make do. If you can, try to finish enemies with it for a nice health boost. This means being able to predict how much health a class will have after so long of burning. The secondary slot is left open for your choice. The Detonator might be the best compliment to the set for the mobility boost, but shotgun is also a great choice. Gas Jockey is the only viable set. The other two have massive holes and aren't even real recognized sets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vy'drach Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 Actually interested in what you have to say about the Shitney Sleeper set. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted October 15, 2011 Author Share Posted October 15, 2011 DEMO Stock set --- Grenade launcher Sticky launcher Bottle --- Very sturdy setup. As with Scout and Soldier, only the melee slot calls for a change. Expert's Ordinance --- Loch n Load Ullapool caber --- This set focuses straight on damage. The loch n load is extremely damaging, as is the caber. Both are risky to use, as both do huge self damage and have either a single use or require dead on accuracy. Also, the set gives you resistance to fire. You get your choice of a secondary. The stock sticky launcher is probably best, as the shields don't fit with the caber, and the scottish resistance is more defense based. One-thousand-and-one Demoknights --- Ali-baba's Wee Booties Splendid Screen Persian Persuader --- This is the demoknight set. All three of these items work -very- well together, with the only weakness being you have ONLY a melee weapon. However, that eliminates the downside of the persian persuader and helps you survive. Swashbuckler's Swag --- Scottish Handshake Bootlegger --- This is a brand new set. The two weapons in it are only reskins, unfortunately, of the Bottle and Ali-Baba's Wee Booties. These two do very little together and almost force a charge shield on the secondary slot. The unlocks aren't a set this time around, as all can't be equipped at once. The demoknight set is frankly amazing for the sub-class. The rest are alright, but nothing special. Heavy Stock --- Minigun Shotgun Fists --- The shotgun and fists are major setbacks to the Heavy's arsenal. He has so many better options for those two slots. Unlock set --- Natascha Sandvich KGB --- This is the polar opposite of the stock set. Now the problem is the primary, which is less than par. Melee and secondary are good, though. The Hibernating Bear --- Brass Beast Buffalo Steak Sandvich Warrior's Spirit --- This set has a bonus. You have a tiny Crit resistance. All of 5%. Know how much that helps? Considering you have 20 less HP, none at all. The set itself is pretty bad, too. Eating the steak makes you even more vulnerable, and the damage of the Warrior's Spirit isn't enough to justify anything. The Brass Beast is a good defensive weapon, but losing out on some HP makes it even more of a gamble to carry. Heavy's running this set should be strictly defensive, optimally with a medic, and he should only eat the steak when he can ambush attacking enemies from a flank. The Black Market Business --- Tomislav Family Business Eviction Notice --- The Black Market Business set is almost the polar opposite of the hibernating bear, every component focuses on faster attack speed at the cost of damage. Which makes the set a bit redundant. With tomislav, there's not really any need at all for a side arm or need to pull out melee. The whole point of the eviction notice is to make it so you don't need to spin up a cumbersome gun or rely on a shotgun for protection. Heavies using this set are best off ambushing enemy players. The Family Business should only be used if you run out of ammo. All of the Heavy sets are pretty bad. They are over specialized or contain horrible items, or both. Engineer Stock set --- Shotgun Pistol Wrench --- Very sturdy set, all three components are -extremely- useful to the Engineer and leave no weaknesses. Unlock set --- Frontier Justice Wrangler Gunslinger --- This set is much more specialized for combat engies. However, the Wrangler is out of place, a pistol would suit the cause MUCH better. Engie has no real sets, but both of these are pretty good. Except for the Wrangler. Wrangler is awesome, just not on minisentries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milkyway64 Posted July 9, 2012 Author Share Posted July 9, 2012 And all the buffs, nerfs, re-evaluated opinions, and etc... Hoo boy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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